IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

You bought a TV a week ago but when you got home you discovered it did not work properly. You called customer service to report the problem but you have not yet received any help.

#tv #week #home #work #customer #service #report #help
Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing to express my dissatisfaction with the poor performance of the television that I purchased from your store
last
 week. I am Kinnari Bodade, I live
besides
Replace the word
beside
show examples
 your store in Toronto. I have been purchasing electronic products from your store
from
Change preposition
for
show examples
past
Correct article usage
the past
show examples
 7 years,
thus
, I purchased '
samsung
Change the capitalization
Samsung
show examples
 led 32 inches' with the product code 289636 on 5th August. The first problem was the lack of display quality.
While
 perusing the product specifications it was mentioned that 40 pixels
led
Correct your spelling
LED
show examples
 light were used to provide high screen
resolution
.Contrary to
this
, I observed the screen to be low
resolution
 and blurry.
Furthermore
, the remote
also
 stopped working suddenly, making the matter
more
Change the word
apply
show examples
worse. I am unpleased that I had spent so much money on a product
that is
 not working properly. I connected with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
customer care
6th
Change preposition
on 6th
show examples
August
Change preposition
of August
show examples
 and explained
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
the issue. Despite raising the complaint, I did not get any information from them regarding the
resolution
 of the problem. As a
resolution
 to
this
 problem, I would appreciate
if
Correct pronoun usage
it if
show examples
 you could repair the machine at no cost to me. Thanks for taking
this
 matter into consideration. Yours sincerely, Kinnari Bodade
Submitted by nihalshetty384 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Your letter does well to address the task prompt comprehensively; however, it can be improved by including more specific details. For instance, mentioning exactly what the customer care representative said would strengthen your case.
coherence cohesion
Pay attention to minor grammatical inaccuracies and punctuation errors. Correct phrases like 'from past 7 years' to 'for the past 7 years' and ensure proper spacing after commas and periods.
coherence cohesion
Your letter has a clear and well-structured flow, starting with a polite but firm introduction, detailing the issues with the TV, and ending with a clear request for resolution.
task achievement
Strong task achievement with a clear response to each part of the prompt, including specific product details and a chronological account of actions taken.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: