The wealth of a nation is said to depend on the health of its citizens. Yet, in the modern knowledge-based economies of the world, education is more and more being seen as the main force in the development of all countries. In what extent do you agree or disagree?

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In the modern world, many people believe that the wealth of
Use synonyms
nation
Correct article usage
a nation
show examples
is considered based on the
health
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of its
citizen
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citizens
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.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, some people believe that
education
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plays a vital role in the development of a
nation
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. I do believe that the
economony
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economy
plays
bigger
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a bigger
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role
on
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in
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driving development.
Education
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playing
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plays
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a
crusial
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crucial
role when it
come
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comes
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to
economy
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an economy
the economy
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that happened because
education
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enables individuals to acquire knowledge and skills.
Moreover
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, an educated workforce contributes to economic growth. India is one of the
example
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examples
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with
this
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case.
According to
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Correct article usage
the new
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new
Capitalize word
New
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yoerk
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york
times, India is improving their economy through improving their
education
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. As for their expertise in IT which means most of their economy is based on its Human Capital.
Furthermore
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, investing
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education
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in education
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leads to improve
health
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outsomes
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outcomes
. Another reason is
education
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can
promotes
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promote
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innovation and technological advancement. With technology, it can help to address
healthcare
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challenges.
However
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, I
also
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believe that
education
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and
health
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are interconnected and influence each other. With the advancement of technology and
education
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, they will create a significant change in
healthcare
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facilities in a positive way.
In addition
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, good
healthcare
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wiill
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will
create
healtier
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healthier
citizen
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citizens
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.
Thus
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, they are more likely to participate in the workforce. In conclusion, as
priority
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a priority
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for the
sort
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short
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term goal, I believe that
education
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will give more significant change
on
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in
show examples
the wealth of
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nation
Correct article usage
the nation
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. As for the medium and
long term
Add a hyphen
long-term
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goal for a
nation
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, I
also
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believe
good
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a good
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education
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will
impacting
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impact
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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healthcare
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.
Thus
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, A balanced investment in both
education
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and
health
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is essential for national development
Submitted by alyalihan28 on

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coherence cohesion
To enhance the logical structure, you could ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea supported by a few sentences of explanation or examples. This will make your argument more coherent and easier to follow.
coherence cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, use more linking phrases and transition words. This will help in connecting your ideas smoothly and maintaining a logical flow.
task achievement
To achieve a more complete response to the task, make sure you address all parts of the question. Explain both viewpoints more thoroughly and offer a balanced opinion.
task achievement
To make your ideas clearer and more comprehensive, focus on developing each point fully. Give more specific examples and expand on your explanations to illustrate your arguments better.
task achievement
Your introduction sets up the essay topic well, and you clearly state your opinion early on, which is important for a high task achievement score.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points and restates your opinion, providing a sense of closure to the essay.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • wealth
  • nation
  • citizens
  • health
  • education
  • knowledge-based economies
  • development
  • force
  • agree
  • disagree
  • vital role
  • progress
  • interconnected
  • influence
  • investing
  • improved outcomes
  • acquire
  • skills
  • workforce
  • economic growth
  • participate
  • promotes
  • innovation
  • technological advancements
  • address
  • challenges
  • balanced investment
  • essential
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