IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The charts below show the average percentages in typical meals of three types of nutrients, all of which may be unhealthy if eaten too much. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant.

The charts below show the average percentages in typical meals of three types of nutrients, all of which may be unhealthy if eaten too much. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant.
#show #percentages #meals #three #nutrients #summarise #information #features #comparison
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The pie charts depict three types of
meals
Fix the agreement mistake
meal
show examples
 nutrients (
sodium
Use synonyms
, saturated fat, added
sugar
Use synonyms
) which are unhealthy if overly eaten.
Overall
Linking Words
, saturated fat and added
sugar
Use synonyms
 have
same
Change the article
the same
show examples
 percentage in the breakfast. Following that,
sodium
Use synonyms
 had the highest
proportion
Use synonyms
 during lunch.
Sodium
Use synonyms
consumption
Use synonyms
 leads the chart
proportion
Use synonyms
 during dinner and it had the lowest
proportion
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
snack time.
In
Change preposition
At
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
breakfast time, most people consume saturated fat and
sugar
Use synonyms
 with
identical
Add an article
an identical
show examples
percentage
Fix the agreement mistake
percentages
show examples
 which was 16%, and
sodium
Use synonyms
 was in the
last
Linking Words
proportion
Use synonyms
 with only 14%.
However
Linking Words
,
sodium
Use synonyms
consumption
Use synonyms
 surged 29% during lunch,
while
Linking Words
 saturated fat followed closely which was 26%. Added
sugar
Use synonyms
 stood in the least eaten
compares
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
 to other nutrients with only 19%. During
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
dinner,
sodium
Use synonyms
 had the highest percentage which
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
 43%,
following
Wrong verb form
followed
show examples
with
Change preposition
by
show examples
 saturated fat
37
Change preposition
at 37
show examples
% and
lastly
Linking Words
 added
sugar
Use synonyms
23
Change preposition
at 23
show examples
%. Snacks
proportion
Use synonyms
 had the most added
sugar
Use synonyms
consumption
Use synonyms
 which was 42%,
whereas
Linking Words
 saturated fat and
sodium
Use synonyms
consumption
Use synonyms
 were only 21% and 14% respectively.
Submitted by debbychrist10 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Replace the words sodium, sugar, proportion, consumption with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 5 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • nutrients
  • average percentage
  • distribution
  • consumption
  • meal times
  • excessive
  • implications
  • dietary
  • intake
  • macronutrients
  • saturated fats
  • sugars
  • sodium
  • unhealthy
  • proportion
  • variation
What to do next:
Look at other essays: