Art classes, such as painting and drawing are as important to a child's development as other subjects so it should bes compulsory in high schools. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

#art #classes #child #development #subjects #bes #schools

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There is no denying the fact that

art

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is essential for children's creativity and growth and should be used wisely.

While

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it is commonly held belief that

art

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sessions should be taught especially for higher grades, because painting and drawing are vital for

kids

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kids'

kid's

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development, there is

also

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an argument that opposes it. I consider that

art

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sessions should be invested in useful activities.

To begin

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with, We should increase

art

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sessions for high school.

In other words

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art

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could improve ethical behaviour and decrease stress, especially for young ages.

In addition

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art

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acquires a high amount of innovation and creativity,

Furthermore

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, teachers should collaborate to increase the amount of opportunities for children to visit museums and

art

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galleries. Another point to consider,

art

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should be invested

from

Change preposition

in by

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various authorities, which, could improve culture. It is

also

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possible to say that we could combine

art

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with technology to improve

art

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periods .

On the other hand

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, we could encourage children to construct interpersonal relationships between students

while

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painting or drawing. In conclusion, despite people

have

Wrong verb form

having

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various views, I believe that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

art

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is the power of innovation for every child,

also

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art

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could be taught for various ages,since, It could improve their lifelong learning and their personal growth.

Submitted by pcah70 on Mon Jul 15 2024

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task achievement

The essay presents a clear opinion on the topic but doesn't expand on the opposing argument. To achieve a higher score, it would be beneficial to acknowledge and address counterpoints more thoroughly.

task achievement

Your essay would benefit from additional specific examples that strengthen your arguments. Personal anecdotes or referencing well-known studies can add depth to your points.

coherence cohesion

The logical flow of the essay can be improved. For instance, it would help to break down large paragraphs into smaller ones focused on a single idea. Use transition words more effectively to guide the reader.

coherence cohesion

Your main points need better development and support. For example, you mention that art can reduce stress and improve ethical behavior, but explaining how art achieves this with specific instances would strengthen your argument.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which bookend the main body well. This shows a good understanding of essay structure.

task achievement

You bring up valid and relevant points about the benefits of art education, such as creativity and cultural improvement.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction
Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

2 paragraphs

204 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Cognitive abilities
Emotional expression
Cultural awareness
Fine motor skills
Creativity and innovation
Academic performance
Self-esteem
Social interaction
Teamwork skills
Artistic pursuits
Developmental stages
Diversity and inclusivity
Perspective-taking
Holistic development
Emotional intelligence

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Art classes, such as painting and drawing are as important to a child's development as other subjects so it should bes compulsory in high schools. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

Some people think that violent sports such as martial arts and boxing should be banned from international competitions. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Most people take interviews to select a person for a job. What are the other ways? What do you think is the best way to recruit new employees?

Today many children and teenagers are overweight and unhealthy. Give reasons to explain why many young people are obese and give some solutions to fix the problem.

Some people think that the education system should only focus on preparing students for employment, while others believe it has other important functions. Discuss both sides and then give your own opinion.

In many countries crime rates among teenagers are higher than among other groups.What are the causes for this problem and what can be done to solve this?