IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The given bar chart illustrates the percentage of residents’ coffee and tea purchasing and consuming habits in last 4 weeks in five different cities (Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane, Adelaide, and Hobart) in Australia.

The given bar chart illustrates the percentage of residents’ coffee and tea purchasing and consuming habits in last 4 weeks in five different cities (Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane, Adelaide, and Hobart) in Australia.
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The provided graph compares the proportions of consuming
coffee
Use synonyms
 among Australians in five cities;Sydney, Melbourne,Brisbane,Adelaide, and Hobart during the past four weeks. Looking from an
overall
Linking Words
 perspective,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 the majority of citizens
prevered
Correct your spelling
preferred
 to go to
cafe
Add an article
a cafe
the cafe
show examples
, meanwhile, the least consumption was of fresh
coffee
Use synonyms
. 
According to
Linking Words
 the bar chart, the city of Melbourne consumed about 43%of fresh
coffee
Use synonyms
 and 49%of instant
coffee
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
, the total percentage of going to
cafe
Fix the agreement mistake
cafes
show examples
reashed
Correct your spelling
reached
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 peak
by
Change preposition
of
show examples
approximatly
Correct your spelling
approximately
 64%. At the same time, Hobart and
Sydney
Add the possessive form
Sydney's
show examples
 city presented
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
closer results to Melbourne, regarding the given information the residents of both
citites
Correct your spelling
cities
took nearly 63% ,and 62% respectively.
On the contrary
Linking Words
, Brisbane and Adelaide showed
a similar rates
Correct the article-noun agreement
similar rates
a similar rate
show examples
 of buying fresh
coffee
Use synonyms
 nearly 35%.
Additionally
Linking Words
, when it comes to
buy
Change the verb form
buying
show examples
 instant
coffee
Use synonyms
 Brisbane people bought about 54% which is
consiodered
Correct your spelling
considered
 as higher than Adelaide's rate by 5%.

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words coffee with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • percentage
  • residents
  • habits
  • purchasing
  • consuming
  • illustrates
  • comparison
  • preferences
  • trend
  • frequency
  • café culture
  • observations
  • urban lifestyle
  • fresh coffee
  • instant coffee
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