Some parents purchase their children a large number of minuature to play with.What are the advantages and disadvantages for the kids of having lot of toys.
Plenty of parents acquire their
child
loads of Fix the agreement mistake
children
toys
. Toys
might improve child's
Correct article usage
a child's
gross-motor
skills, Correct your spelling
gross motor
although
pampering child
would lead Correct article usage
a child
child
having unpleasant
personality. Add an article
an unpleasant
This
essay agrees that advantages
outweigh Correct article usage
the advantages
disadvantages
.
Correct article usage
the disadvantages
Prior
advantage of buying your little one lots of Correct article usage
A prior
toys
is it improves child's
coordination. Correct article usage
a child's
While
constructing some buildings with toy blocks, youngsters's eye-hand coordination would be developed. Also
, purpose
of some Add an article
the purpose
toys
is to develop movements committed by boy
or girl smoothly. Correct article usage
a boy
For instance
, with help
of Correct article usage
the help
lego
pieces, Capitalize word
Lego
child
may build constructions using his eye and hand, evolving both parts of his or her body.
Add an article
the child
a child
On the other hand
, purchasing too much baubles might also
be bad. This
issue is well-known among parents who have pampered their babies. Time passes, spoiled boy lasts being boastful. Boasting for
many times is the major reason, why people would repel you. It may get even worse if any actions are not done. Change preposition
apply
For example
, friend
of mine used to show off multiple times. After numerous boasts, other mates started to talk bad things about him behind his back. After 3 years, we cut our bond off, because of his importunity.
Add an article
a friend
To sum up
, this
essay still holds its position that advanteges
preponderate over disadvantages. Improving skills is good, but Correct your spelling
advantages
boastful
personality is Correct article usage
a boastful
significant
problem.Add an article
a significant
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task achievement
Ensure that every paragraph has a clear central idea and that your main points are fully developed. Expand on how toys develop gross-motor skills and elaborate on how pampering can lead to an unpleasant personality.
coherence cohesion
Enhance the logical structure of your essay by using linking words and a clear sequence of ideas. Make sure every sentence flows logically from the previous one, helping the reader to follow your argument easily.
general linguistic
Check for grammatical issues and spelling errors. For instance, words like 'miniature' and 'advantages' were misspelled. Also, reconsider phrasing to enhance readability and avoid awkward constructions.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, framing your argument well and summarizing your points succinctly.
task achievement
You have addressed both the advantages and disadvantages of the topic, showing a balanced approach to the issue.
task achievement
The use of specific examples, such as Lego pieces helping develop eye-hand coordination and the story about your friend, adds depth to your argument and makes it more relatable.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?