The line graph below shows the number of serious crimes that occurred in London between 2003 and 2012. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

#line #crimes #london #summarise #information #features #comparisons

The line graph illustrates three different

crime

rates in London in number of

crimes

between 2003 and 2012.

Overall

while

armed robbery exhibited a significant decline in

crime

rates, assault showed a steady increase and murder remained relatively stable between 2003 and 2012.

Firstly

, armed robbery was the highest

crime

in 2003 with 3,500

crimes

which peaked at nearly 3,700 in 2004 before dropping significantly from 2005 to 2008 to its lowest number of just above 1,000

crimes

. After that, it experienced a steady increase to 1,5000 in 2009, reaching a fluctuation until the end of the period, having the second highest

crime

rate.

On the other hand

, assault experienced a steady fluctuation between 2003 and 2009, beginning with approximately 2,300 and

then

exhibiting a stable variation between over 2,000 to below 2,5000, replacing armed robbery as the most significant

crime

in 2006. Afterwards, it showed a steady rise of almost 500 in the next 3 years.

Likewise

, murder began having the lowest

crime

rate with 500

crimes

in 2003,

then

rising modestly to just above 1,000 in 2005, and dropped to a stable fluctuation of around 500

crimes

between 2006 and 2012.

Submitted by kahenahoffmann on Fri Jul 19 2024

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words crime, crimes with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "stable" was used 3 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "significant" was used 3 times.

▼

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

193 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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