People living in large cities today face many problems in their everyday lives. What are these problems? Should governments encourage people to move to smaller regional towns?

#people #cities #face #lives #governments #move #towns

Although

living in a large

city

can be beneficial for some reasons, living in

this

kind of place

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

problems

to handle on a daily basis. For those

matter

Fix the agreement mistake

matters

show examples

, I strongly argue the argument to relocate individuals to a different town. There are a few

problems

that

appeared

Wrong verb form

appear

show examples

in metropolitan

city

Fix the agreement mistake

cities

show examples

because more and more

people

reside and

moved

Wrong verb form

move

show examples

from other places.

Firstly

, traffic congestion which

caused

Add a missing verb

is caused

show examples

by many cars and motorcycles

Change preposition

show examples

the main road, especially in rush hour when many

people

and

Rephrase

back and

show examples

back

for

Change preposition

show examples

their

job

Fix the agreement mistake

jobs

show examples

or school.

Furthermore

this

trend produces a lot of pollution which poses a risk to all

people

particularly older

people

and children.

For example

, Jakarta which is

Correct article usage

the

show examples

capital

city

of Indonesia known as a

crowd

Change the verb form

crowded

show examples

city

full of traffic jams and

pollutions

Fix the agreement mistake

pollution

show examples

Therefore

, these

problems

should be overcome by regulating the system comprehensively,

instead

relocate

Change the verb form

relocating

show examples

citizen

Fix the agreement mistake

citizens

show examples

other town

Change the wording

another town

other towns

show examples

. Based on the facts that

already

Add a missing verb

have already

show examples

mentioned

Add a missing verb

been mentioned

show examples

, some measures should be taken in order to solve these

problems

.The government should provide more public transportation which

connect

Change the verb form

connects

show examples

and integrate between

outer

Add an article

the outer

show examples

city

and

Correct article usage

the center

show examples

center

Change the spelling

centre

show examples

city

. By providing these facilities it can reduce the

vehicles

Change noun form

vehicle's

vehicles'

show examples

dense

Replace the word

density

show examples

and

also

the rate of

pollutions

Fix the agreement mistake

pollution

show examples

will decrease significantly.

Moreover

, the

authority

Fix the agreement mistake

authorities

show examples

have to impose

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

strict

rule

Fix the agreement mistake

rules

show examples

regarding car

emission

Fix the agreement mistake

emissions

show examples

that should meet the

treshold

Correct your spelling

threshold

For instance

, Tokyo

city

has

succesed

Correct your spelling

succeed

succeeded

to reach

Change preposition

in reaching

show examples

clean

Correct article usage

a clean

show examples

air

city

by controlling

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

car

emission

Fix the agreement mistake

emissions

show examples

Thus

this

role could be implied in Jakarta to solve its issues.

To conclude

, living in

big

Correct article usage

a big

show examples

city

indeed resulting many

problems

for many

people

such

as traffic congestion and pollution. The best way to overcome these

problems

is not

relocating

Change the verb form

to relocate

show examples

the residents, but the Government should provide public transportation and apply strict

regulation

Fix the agreement mistake

regulations

show examples

Submitted by mfmakarim55 on Fri Jul 19 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response

Ensure that each paragraph clearly supports your main argument. While you discuss transportation and pollution issues effectively, try to link them more directly to the overall topic of whether relocation should be encouraged.

coherence cohesion

Use more cohesive devices and linking words to connect your ideas and sentences better. Examples include 'in addition', 'moreover', 'consequently', and 'as a result'.

general

Avoid small grammatical errors and focus on sentence variety to enhance clarity. For instance, 'live and move' instead of 'reside and moved', and 'the dense traffic' instead of 'vehicles dense'.

general

Make an effort to diversify vocabulary to avoid repetition. Instead of using 'city' repeatedly, consider synonyms like 'urban area', 'metropolis', or 'municipality'.

task response

The introduction effectively presents the topic and states a clear position.

task response

Good use of specific examples to illustrate the problems of traffic congestion and pollution.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a well-structured format with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.

task response

You successfully used examples such as Jakarta and Tokyo to support your arguments, which adds credibility and depth to your essay.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

13Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
38Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

291 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5

6.5

Logical structure

7.5

Introduction & conclusion present

6.5

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

6.5

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
Nowadays longer distances are travelled by people to work and study on a daily basis. Some considered it to be a negative development. While others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
In this modern era, people often commute longer distances to reach their workplaces and colleges. There can be various reasons behind this situation and many people consider it a positive development. While others don't think the same. This essay will discuss both views and outline a conclusion to support my opinion.
8
band
Some feel that it is impossible for a country to be economically progressive and environmentally friendly at the same time. Others disagree with this view. Discuss both points of view and give your opinion.
Some individuals hold the view that a government might have a developed economy and be sustainable at the same time whereas others claim it is next to impossible. I believe, that even if it is difficult to get rid of all the polluters, we can implement some effective measures and be more conscious to make nature cleaner. The points of view will be examined below in the essay.
4.5
band
Improvements in health, education and trade are essential for the development of poorer nations. However, the governments of richer nations should take more responsibility for helping the poorer nations in such areas.
Existance of poors damages both groups, the rich and the poor. Over the last decades we can see powerful countries are trying to protect and help developing countries. They are insisting on that all countries should be developed and the power should be balanced between them. It is obvious that countries help each other, especially poorers to make this balance. I think it is an excellent idea, poorer countries will be improved and world dicipline can be handled easier. I believe it helps poorer economies to stay well as western countries are.
7.5
band
Some people think it's better to choose friends who always have the same opinion as them. Other people believe it's good to have friends who sometimes disagree with them. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Nowadays, rapid change is happening all over the world, not only in the environment but also the humans. We must acknowledge that we humans are evolving. Moreover, this situation leads to a discussion about whether we opt to befriend someone who always has the same idea and thought process or whether we better make a connection with a person who sometimes possesses different and contrasting ideas from us. This essay will explain both views along my point of view, which is in favour of the latter statement because of its long-term benefits and end it with a conclusion.
6.5
band
Some people believe that women should be treated as equal to men when applying for a job with police or the military. Others think women are less suitable for this kind of job. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
There has been a discussion about whether women should be treated equally like men in military jobs. The writer argues that they should have equal rights due to the support for men's weakness and gender equality despite those who believe that women are not strong enough.

People living in large cities today face many problems in their everyday lives. What are these problems? Should governments encourage people to move to smaller regional towns?

Your opinion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Nowadays longer distances are travelled by people to work and study on a daily basis. Some considered it to be a negative development. While others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some feel that it is impossible for a country to be economically progressive and environmentally friendly at the same time. Others disagree with this view. Discuss both points of view and give your opinion.

Improvements in health, education and trade are essential for the development of poorer nations. However, the governments of richer nations should take more responsibility for helping the poorer nations in such areas.

Some people think it's better to choose friends who always have the same opinion as them. Other people believe it's good to have friends who sometimes disagree with them. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that women should be treated as equal to men when applying for a job with police or the military. Others think women are less suitable for this kind of job. Discuss both views and give your opinion.