the pie charts below show the number of hours spent in a british university library

the pie charts below show the number of hours spent in a british university library
IELTS Writing Task Chart for the pie charts below show the number of hours spent in a british university library
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The blueprints beneath illustrate the amount of
hours
Use synonyms
devoted to a British university library by college students, alumni, and the whole student population.
Overall
Linking Words
, I believe that all students fairly invest time studying in the bookroom as provided in the charts. The table data clearly shows that simply over half of the graduates consume 15
hours
Use synonyms
or more in the book collection space. In comparison with undergraduates, the percentage is significantly lower than postgraduates; to be exact it is 9
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
. The most striking difference in the data for under apprentices was that a sizeable number of learners devour 1 to 7
hours
Use synonyms
in the information
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
in vast contrast to the one-time apprentices; correspondingly, the small minority of the post-apprentices disburse 1 to seven
hours
Use synonyms
in the media
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
. It is conspicuous that nearly one-third of post-learners spend 8 to 14
hours
Use synonyms
in the book collection room than the scholars. In conclusion, one-half of all students spend time in the bookroom from 1 to 7
hours
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,
furthermore
Linking Words
only over one in three start with 8 and end with 14
hours
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, and a small minority waste 15
hours
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or
further
Linking Words
in the library respectively

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words hours with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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