You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Schools are spending more time teaching traditional subjects such as history. Some people think they should rather spend more time in teaching skills that can help students find a job. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

Nowadays there
is
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are
show examples
two ways of
compeleting
Correct your spelling
completing
school, either by teaching one type of skill, which the
student
Add a missing verb
is intrested
show examples
intrested
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interested
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
or the traditional way. So some think that
,
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apply
show examples
providing the
student
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students
show examples
directly with
skills
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the skills
show examples
they need can help them in many ways ,
while
others believe that, during
shool
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school
show examples
years
student
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students
show examples
should have broad knowledge by studying all subjects.
This
essay will discuss both sides and will draw my personal conclusion. On
one
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the one
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hand, learning by old methods will give the learner a chance to understand different areas of future jobs,  
For example
, some
student
has
intrests
Correct your spelling
interests
on
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in
show examples
many things
therefor
Correct your spelling
therefore
show examples
learning multiple subjects can give them
a
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an
show examples
opportunity to choose their final destination and will
shap
Correct your spelling
shape
their vision, So that's why some think that
,
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apply
show examples
having a view of all aspect of
knowledage
Correct your spelling
knowledge
will help them to choose their job.
On the other hand
, teaching skills
immidiatly
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immediately
to students who
has
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have
show examples
interest
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an interest
show examples
in
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a specifiec
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specifiec
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specific
area
,
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apply
show examples
will help them to improve and give them experience. For illustration, kids who want to be
an
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apply
show examples
engineer
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engineers
show examples
,
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apply
show examples
can start directly studying math,
physics
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and physics
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and
having
Wrong verb form
have
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some
hands on
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hands-on
show examples
class
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classes
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,
in addition
to connecting them to some
enginnering
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engineering
collage
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college
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for summer courses.
Hence
,
the
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
believe that directing
student
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the student
a student
show examples
to
path
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the path
show examples
they want is
time saving
Add a hyphen
time-saving
show examples
and,
consider
Wrong verb form
considered
show examples
as
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apply
show examples
a better option for their future. In conclusion , after a
carful
Correct your spelling
careful
show examples
analysis of both points of view. I believe that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
teaching students different subjects will allow
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
them to have an overview of all aspects
to choose
Change preposition
of choosing
show examples
their own
career
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careers
show examples
.
Submitted by meajaberi on

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coherence cohesion
Make sure to clearly structure your introduction and conclusion. Your introduction should explicitly state your opinion. In the body paragraphs, make sure each main idea is clearly supported with relevant examples and details.
coherence cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, use linking words and phrases more effectively to connect your ideas. This will help the essay flow better.
task achievement
You have some grammatical and spelling errors. Pay attention to these to make your writing clearer and more professional. Additionally, keep an eye on punctuation errors, particularly with comma usage.
task achievement
To better support your main points, use more specific and detailed examples. Discussing how traditional subjects or skill-focused education can impact different career paths or personal development would have strengthened your arguments.
task achievement
You have made a good attempt to discuss both sides of the argument, and you restated your opinion in the conclusion.
coherence cohesion
Your essay shows a general understanding of the topic and demonstrates the ability to engage with both perspectives.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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