In many countries people have to pay for medical care, but some think that it should be a free service provided by the government. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Health
is a critical issue that people
around the world are concerning. At present, there are selected countries where people
have free access
to healthcare service
, Fix the agreement mistake
services
while
in many others, its citizens have to spend a lot of money to monitor their health
and cure their illnesses. In my opinion, it should be universal that access
to medical care is free because this
is a must-do to keep labour
force of a country strong and productive and it is a basic Correct article usage
the labour
rights
that Change the noun form
right
people
around the world are entitled to.
It is undeniable that the
medical services are expensive, whether it be an annual check-up or a required surgical operation. An all-in Correct article usage
apply
costs
for a c-section to deliver a baby can be up to $1000. With Fix the agreement mistake
cost
this
mass amount of money required to save life
, some Fix the agreement mistake
lives
government
are not capable Fix the agreement mistake
governments
to cover
all the expenses. Change preposition
of covering
Therefore
, it is the responsibility of individuals or their families to gather financial
support needed if they must go through Correct article usage
the financial
such
procedure
. Correct article usage
a procedure
However
, I believe that the government
can do more to support their
citizens.
With that being said, one must consider that a healthy workforce can contribute to the country's economic prosperity. When it is related to Correct pronoun usage
its
the
national economic growth, I think, the Correct article usage
apply
government
has a role to play. Two of the mechanisms that the government
can adopt to ensure a healthy labour force are the
free Correct article usage
apply
access
to healthcare service
and the encouragement Fix the agreement mistake
services
to
its Change preposition
of
people
to do frequent health
check-ups.
Another important justification that the government
should provide its residents free access
to healthcare service
is that it is clearly a basic need. Nobody Fix the agreement mistake
services
wants
stay home when they are sick; they Add the particle
wants to
also
want to visit clinics to check and understand what is wrong with their health
. Everyone wants to lead a healthy life.
All in all, I strongly agree that health related
services should be freely accessible to all, and the Add a hyphen
health-related
government
should be responsible for the cost related to this
Fix the agreement mistake
these services
service
. By doing so, the country would have a healthy human resource who can contribute significantly to the economic development. Also
, it is the most basic thing that people
need in order to live happily.Submitted by emteeme on
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task achievement
You have provided a clear response to the task and maintained a consistent stance throughout the essay. However, the argument could benefit from more specific examples or evidence to better support your main points. Consider including statistics, case studies or real-life examples to strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
The essay is well-structured with a clear introduction and conclusion. Each paragraph logically follows the previous one, making the argument easy to follow. However, the transitions between some paragraphs could be smoother. Using more transitional phrases can help enhance the flow of your arguments.
introduction conclusion
Your introduction is strong, clearly stating your stance and outlining the main points you intend to discuss. This sets a clear direction for the essay.
supported main points
You have provided supporting points that are relevant to your argument, making your essay persuasive. This demonstrates your ability to build a logical argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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