The map shows the town of Stokeford in 1930 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

The map shows the town of Stokeford in 1930 and 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

Write at least 150 words.
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The thesis maps demonstrate
,
Remove the comma
apply
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the changes that have happened in the country of Stokeford from 1930 TO 2010 . it is clear from that map that there are more housing in 2010
According to
Linking Words
what is shown , in the north of the map remove farmland and add
houses
Use synonyms
.
Linking Words
also
Capitalize word
Also
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, in 2010 the shops were removed and put
instead
Linking Words
shops
houses
Use synonyms
, and
street
Correct article usage
a street
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furthermore
Linking Words
we can see the primary school
get
Wrong verb form
getting
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bigger In the sou th we
also
Linking Words
can see the farmland
removed
Verb problem
apply
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and
houses
Use synonyms
,
in addition
Linking Words
, the garden was removed and
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
large
houses
Use synonyms
in
Add a missing verb
were in
show examples
2010 . they add a retirement house
To sum up
Linking Words
, we could say that have a lot of changes the biggest is putting more
houses
Use synonyms
and removing farmland
Submitted by kiwawtytime99 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words houses with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "maps" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • town
  • population
  • transformed
  • bustling
  • road network
  • residential areas
  • industrial sites
  • commercial zones
  • river
  • public transportation
  • infrastructure
  • schools
  • hospitals
  • shopping centers
  • educational facilities
  • healthcare facilities
  • urbanization
  • development
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