Few people devote time to hobbies nowadays. Say why you think this is the case and what effect this has on the individual and society in general.

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While
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

it is widely claimed that few
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

devote
time
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

less on
hobbies
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

nowadays, others argue that there are numerous
factor
Fix the agreement mistake
factors

It seems that factor may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
that
contributing
Wrong verb form
contribute

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb contributing. Consider changing it.

show examples
Linking Words
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

such
Change preposition
to such

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
effects both individually and socially. Both
cause
Correct article usage
the cause

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
and effect of
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

worrying trend will be elaborated on
Linking Words
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

this
Change preposition
in this

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
essay.
To begin
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

with, it may
seems
Change the verb form
seem

The verb seems after the modal verb may does not appear to be in the correct form. Consider changing the verb form.

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sensible for some to believe that leisure activities
often
Add a missing verb
are often

It seems that you are missing a verb. Consider adding it.

show examples
overlooked
from
Change preposition
by

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
society
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

these days as
an
Remove the article
apply

The indefinite article, an, may be redundant when used with the uncountable noun competition in your sentence. Consider removing it.

show examples
intense competition among the employment industries.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

is
possibly
Replace the adverb
possible

It appears that the adverb possibly should be an adjective. Consider replacing it.

show examples
because they generally viewed it as an activity for personal entertainment and not
that
Correct word choice
as

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

show examples
productive
like
Change preposition
as

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
self-improvements
Fix the agreement mistake
self-improvement

It seems that self-improvements may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
.
For example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
a
Remove the article
apply

The indefinite article, a, may be redundant when used with the uncountable noun labour in your sentence. Consider removing it.

show examples
white collar
Add a hyphen
white-collar

It seems that white collar is missing a hyphen. Consider adding the hyphen(s).

show examples
labour
spent
Wrong verb form
spend

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb spent. Consider changing it.

show examples
time
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

on
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
working rather than spending
time
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

on
themselve
Correct your spelling
themselves

If you don’t want themselve to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

just to relax which
left
Wrong verb form
leaves

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb left. Consider changing it.

show examples
them with
fews
Correct your spelling
few

If you don’t want fews to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

hour
Fix the agreement mistake
hours

It seems that hour may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
per day to do
such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

creative activities on a daily basis, preferably they will choose to sleep than
doing
Wrong verb form
do

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb doing. Consider changing it.

show examples
anything else.
However
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, I personally argue in favour of its effects seeing that it indeed
affect
Correct subject-verb agreement
affects

It seems that the verb affect does not agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

show examples
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

either
Change preposition
in either

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
personal or social aspects. In
term
Fix the agreement mistake
terms

It seems that term may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
of personal perspective,
hobbies
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

is
Change the verb form
are

The verb is does not seem to agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

show examples
a creative
ways
Change the noun form
way

The subject or subject complement of the sentence (ways) does not appear to agree with the verb is. Consider changing the noun form.

show examples
of relieving stress from work, without getting it
release
Wrong verb form
released

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb release. Consider changing it.

show examples
through
Linking Words
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

this
Correct determiner usage
these

It seems that determiner use may be incorrect here.

show examples
activities can create mental illness in later
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

time
Fix the agreement mistake
times

It seems that time may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

as depression and stress-related
disorder
Fix the agreement mistake
disorders

It seems that disorder may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
. In a bigger picture, the effect on
society
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

could not seen clearly like individual
aspect
Fix the agreement mistake
aspects

It seems that aspect may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
, yet fewer hours
on
Change preposition
of

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
leisures
Change the noun form
leisure

Your sentence appears to use the incorrect form of leisures. Consider changing it to singular.

show examples
activity can affect
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
society
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

tremendously.
Hobbies
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

provide a practice for
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

to use their imagination and skills, without them
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
society
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

will be lifeless.
For instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

will always
serious
Add a missing verb
be serious

It seems that you are missing a verb. Consider adding it.

show examples
and formal manner. In a nutshell,
although
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

it is undeniable that
few
Correct article usage
a few

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
hours
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are

It seems that the verb is does not agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

show examples
likely to be used for
hobbies
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

recently, I am of the opinion that it does
effect
Correct your spelling
affect

The word effect doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

both
in
Change preposition
on

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
small to large scale and should not be neglected in order to create a meaningful
society
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.

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task achievement
Improve grammar and syntax to avoid common mistakes, such as subject-verb agreement and plural forms.
coherence cohesion
Develop paragraphs more fully with supporting examples, and connect ideas using connecting words or phrases to enhance flow.
task achievement
The essay provides a complete response, addressing both causes and effects in a structured manner.
task achievement
The essay maintains a suitable writing tone and formal register appropriate to the task.
coherence cohesion
Each paragraph contains a single idea, contributing to overall coherence.

The Greeting

Depending on the style and aim of the letter, you will need to adapt your greeting.

Always start an informal letter in the ways:

  • Dear + name
  • Hi / Hello + name

‘Dear...’ is more appropriate, so stick with this.

For a formal letter there are two options for the greeting:

  • Use Dear Sir or Madam if you don’t know the name of the person you are writing to.
  • Use Dear + surname if you do know their name, e.g. Dear Mr Smith or Dear Mrs Jones.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Devote time
  • Hobbies
  • Nowadays
  • Busy
  • Fast-paced
  • Lifestyles
  • Work and career
  • Technology
  • Digital entertainment
  • Limited
  • Free time
  • Lack of motivation
  • Mental wellbeing
  • Physical wellbeing
  • Decreased
  • Social interactions
  • Creativity
  • Self-expression
  • Negative effects
  • Society
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