Some people feel that children should be able to choose the subjects they are interested in while others feel they should study the basic require subjects. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
It is very important for the parents to look after what their children
wants
to study in their lives. Few people argue that students should Change the verb form
want
allow
to select their desired courses. Wrong verb form
be allowed
Whereas
, other
believe that they should focus on the fundamental subjects only. It is Fix the agreement mistake
others
btter
that children should provide the freedom to choose their favorite studies. In the upcoming paragraphs, I will shed light on Correct your spelling
better
the
both views and provide my own opinion as well.
First of all, young ones should Remove the article
apply
allows
the responsibility to Pick their desired course Wrong verb form
be allowed
according
their likes or Add the preposition
according to
dislike
. It will build Correct subject-verb agreement
dislikes
sense
of freedom and Add an article
a sense
self confidence
in them. Which will help them build strong leadership Add a hyphen
self-confidence
skills
in their life. They will learn to take charge of their life and be a better and confident
individual Correct quantifier usage
more confident
of
Change preposition
in
the
society. Correct article usage
apply
For example
, a study conducted at the
Cambridge University in 2019 Correct article usage
apply
that
states that if children are given the freedom Correct pronoun usage
apply
of making
their own decisions it will build a strong development capability in them. It will help them to boost their confidence in future Change preposition
to make
endeavors
. When we allow students to learn their favorite things in school it will build a strong commitment to their goals.
Change the spelling
endeavours
On the other hand
, according to
some school
of Fix the agreement mistake
schools
Fix the agreement mistake
thought
thoughts
kids should only focus on the basic required subjects which are necessary to build certain Add a comma
thoughts,
skills
for their survival. Such
as latest
study conducted Correct article usage
the latest
ad
Correct your spelling
by
trinity western university
in 2024 states that people who learn the Correct your spelling
Trinity Western University
skills
according to
the needs of the market has
higher chances of getting Correct subject-verb agreement
have
job
and Add an article
a job
the job
be
successful as compared to others.
In conclusion, it's always better to learn basic Wrong verb form
being
skills
to survive in this
modern world but kids should be allowed to pick their own classes according to
their likes. Nowadays mostly
parents are allowing their younger ones to select their subjects on their own and it shows remarkable Correct your spelling
most
succes
in Correct your spelling
success
development
of these kids as Correct article usage
the development
a successful individuals
.Correct the article-noun agreement
successful individuals
a successful individual
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task achievement
Your essay provides a clear response to the task, discussing both views and giving your own opinion. However, make sure to proofread your work to correct minor language issues and typos to ensure clarity.
task achievement
Some of your points are well-developed, but try to expand a bit more on the arguments and provide more specific examples or further elaboration.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that your essay maintains a logical structure throughout. Transition words and phrases can help readers follow your argument more easily.
coherence cohesion
Work on consistency in your writing. Avoid abrupt shifts in ideas and try to create smoother transitions between paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps guide the reader through your discussion.
task achievement
You address both sides of the argument and provide your own opinion clearly, fulfilling the requirements of the task.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.