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Writing Samples
Band 7

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarise the information by selecting and reportion the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarise the information by selecting and reportion the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The presented diagram demonstrates data about the
proportion
Use synonyms
 of the number of citizens in 4 distinct Asian countries living in urban areas from the period between 1970 to 2020, with forecasts for 2030 and 2040.
Overall
Linking Words
. the four countries illustrate a steep increase, albeit to a variety of degrees,
Malaysia
Use synonyms
 has been the highest. In the Philippines and
Malaysia
Use synonyms
, the
proportion
Use synonyms
 stood at 30%.
This
Linking Words
proportion
Use synonyms
 increased gradually to 45% in 1990. In the period from 1990 to 2010 in
Malaysia
Use synonyms
, the percentage of individuals in cities sharply rose to 70%. In the same 20 years in the Philippines, there was a marked fall in the quantity to 40%. After 20 years, there will be a recovery in percentage in the Philippines to 50%,
while
Linking Words
 in
Malaysia
Use synonyms
, the figures will exceed 80%. In 1970 in Thailand, the percentage was 19%,
while
Linking Words
 in Indonesia was 15%. They steadily
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
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 to 30% in 2000. The quantity remained stable for 20 years in Thailand.
However
Linking Words
, it increased sharply in Indonesia to 50%. In 2040, the
proportion
Use synonyms
 will noticeably rise in Indonesia and Thailand to 60% and 50% respectively.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words proportion, malaysia with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 4 times.
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