IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel to or work in a foreign country. Others say that these are not the only reasons why someone should learn a foreign language. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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These days,It is argued by some
people
Use synonyms
 that learning a new foreign
language
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 is just about travelling or working in that
country
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.
However
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,other
people
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 feel that there are a considerable number of reasons for learning a foreign
language
Use synonyms
 except
of
Change preposition
for
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trip
Correct article usage
a trip
show examples
 or job.
This
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 essay will look at
the
Remove the article
apply
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both sides of the argument and
also
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 I will present my own opinion. Over the
last
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 few decades,the majority of immigrants have travelled to other countries
so as
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
to find a job or study at a university.Because of
this
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,more and more
people
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 have
this
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 idea that learning a foreign
language
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 just relates
on
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to
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people
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 who tend to live in that
country
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.Generally speaking,If
people
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 learn a new
language
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,they will have
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
 of opportunities in a foreign
country
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.
Moreover
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,
people
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 who are learning a new
language
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 are more comfortable communicating with local
people
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 in that
country
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 rather than
people
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 who do not know that foreign
language
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.
In contrast
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,some
people
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 hold the view that travelling and working in other countries is not the reason for learning their
language
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 by students.
In other words
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,they believe that some
people
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 are keen on studying a new
language
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 in order to teach that foreign
language
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 to others as a teacher.
That is
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 to say,not only do
language
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 learners stay
at
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in
show examples
 their nation,but
also
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 they may teach
to
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apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
other students and earn a substantial amount of money.Clearly,If
people
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 learn a foreign
language
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,they will consist on its benefits.Take be teacher as an example.Another striking reason for learning a foreign
language
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 would be better comprehension
about
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of
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their
Change the word
the
show examples
 culture and local
people
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 in the destination
country
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.It is true that the more knowledge about a foreign
country
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,the more feeling real about their life in that
country
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.
To conclude
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,there is no doubt that learning
a
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in a
show examples
foreign nation is so practical for learners whether in
own
Correct pronoun usage
their own
show examples
country
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 or outside.
However
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,I personally think that If
people
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 can travel or find a job in a foreign
country
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,It will be a better circumstance for them
instead
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 of staying in their own
country
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.

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that there is a clear and distinct separation between paragraphs. Each paragraph should ideally represent a single idea.
coherence cohesion
Make sure to use linking words and phrases more effectively to create a smoother flow between sentences and paragraphs.
task achievement
Avoid repetition of ideas; instead, focus on developing each point with more depth and clarity.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to back up your points. This will help to illustrate your arguments more effectively.
task achievement
Pay attention to minor grammatical errors and punctuation to enhance clarity and readability.
task achievement
The essay addresses both views stated in the prompt, showing a balanced approach.
coherence cohesion
The introduction sets up the topic well and the conclusion summarizes the essay effectively.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • multilingual
  • linguistic proficiency
  • globalized world
  • cross-cultural communication
  • immersive experience
  • adaptability
  • cultural exchange
  • interpersonal skills
  • employment prospects
  • empathy
  • intellectual development
  • overcome language barriers
  • global market
  • resourceful
  • life-changing
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