Some employers offer their employees subsidized membership of gyms and sports clubs, believing that this will make their staff healthier and thus more effective at work. Other employers see no benefit in doing so. Consider the arguments from both aspects of this possible debate, and reach a conclusion.

It is believed that healthy pursuit subsidies can enhance employees’ productivity. I personally disagree with
this
statement to some extent, and I will explain why in
this
essay. On the one hand, it is true that
such
leisure-based subsidies would have a major drawback which is that their efficacy is virtually impossible to quantify.
For example
, with target-related payments, employers can at least see whether the objectives are reached or not. It might
also
be said that, if
this
budget was spent on (
for instance
) on-the-job training or day release programmes, the employees would achieve better career progression and have better job prospects. These matters are all easier to measure, especially in performance reviews and appraisals, and may even help to reduce the risk of redundancy if the company restructures, downsizes or outsources its workforce.
On the other hand
, though, we should consider the various benefits that employees might gain from
this
program. If workers are fitter and less stressed, their working time will be more efficient, leading to higher levels of output and service.
Furthermore
, the work/life balance of the staff will hopefully be improved, because their leisure time will be more fulfilling.
This
may even be more motivating than pay increments, perks, or financial rewards
such
as bonuses or incentives which may be hard to attain.
Finally
, feeling healthier may lead to better job satisfaction, which is in itself a motivating factor.
Overall
,
while
health-related subsidies are superficially attractive for implementation, It seems to me that the lack of measurability is a more substantial drawback. Spending funds on ongoing training would appear to be a better use of company or human resources budgets.
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

relevant specific examples
Your essay would benefit from including more specific examples to further support your points. This can help provide clearer evidence for your arguments.
logical structure
To improve the logical flow, you could consider using more varied transition words and phrases. This can help ensure smoother transitions between your points.
supported main points
Make sure to fully develop your counter-arguments in each paragraph. This will add depth to your analysis and demonstrate a balanced view of both sides of the argument.
introduction conclusion present
Your essay has a clear and logical structure, with a strong introduction and conclusion that frame your arguments well.
complete response
You provided a complete response to the prompt, addressing both sides of the argument effectively.
clear comprehensive ideas
Overall, your essay presents clear and comprehensive ideas, making it easy for the reader to follow your arguments.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • subsidized membership
  • physical activity
  • energy levels
  • employee productivity
  • work performance
  • sick leaves
  • healthier lifestyle
  • absenteeism
  • employee morale
  • workplace environment
  • employee retention
  • corporate image
  • branding
  • health and wellness benefits
  • top talent
  • healthcare costs
  • medical intervention
  • lack of usage
  • underutilization
  • alternative wellness programs
  • mental health resources
  • flexible working hours
  • professional development
  • individual responsibility
  • corporate responsibility
What to do next:
Look at other essays: