IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Some people today believe that the world’s increase in population is unsustainable and will eventually lead to a global crisis. Other people believe that a world population increase is necessary and beneficial as it creates the growth of the world’s economy and society.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
One of the widely discussed issues nowadays is
world’s
Correct article usage
the world’s
show examples
 increase in population.There’s no absolute agreement on
Add an article
the weather
show examples
weather
Correct your spelling
whether
show examples
that
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
 world’s
increase
Add a verb
increase is
increase was
show examples
 unsustainable or beneficial. A commonly held belief that
this
Linking Words
 situation is bad. As evidence of
this
Linking Words
 they point to increasing can lead to global crisis.It could be explained that natural resources couldn’t be enough.
Also
Linking Words
, in the world can be
mess
Correct article usage
a mess
show examples
such
Linking Words
 as paying for something. Any business
more
Add a missing verb
is more
show examples
 likely
stop
Fix the infinitive
to stop
show examples
 because of big competition and any
types
Fix the agreement mistake
type
show examples
 of humanity could be poor.
On the other
Linking Words
hand
Add a comma
hand,
show examples
 some people claim that
population
Correct article usage
a population
show examples
 increase
necessary
Add a missing verb
is necessary
show examples
.
For
Linking Words
example
Add a comma
example,
show examples
 they may mention
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
global society and
economy
Replace the word
economic
show examples
 growth. Some folk think that if people
be
Wrong verb form
are
show examples
 more, workers and businesses will be a lot. And
further
Linking Words
 world’s increasing pros for
country
Add an article
a country
the country
show examples
 with a
little
Correct word choice
small
show examples
 number of population.
Finally
Linking Words
, in my view increasing is unsustainable. Resources really could not be enough for everyone, even now government
turn
Wrong verb form
has turned
show examples
 off the water a lot and food prices are rising. It
lead
Change the verb form
leads
show examples
 to
global
Add an article
the global
a global
show examples
 crisis and in the future many families will live in poverty

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure every paragraph has a clear main idea and use linking words to enhance coherence, such as 'Furthermore,' 'Moreover,' and 'Therefore.' This will help in maintaining a logical flow throughout your essay.
task achievement
Provide specific examples or data to support your arguments. For instance, mention specific countries or statistical data to make your argument more compelling and credible.
task achievement
Your essay presents clear sides of the debate – those who believe population increase is detrimental and those who find it beneficial.
coherence cohesion
You have an evident structure with an introduction, body paragraphs addressing both viewpoints, and a conclusion with your opinion.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Overpopulation
  • Sustainable development
  • Resource depletion
  • Environmental degradation
  • Economic growth
  • Social stability
  • Workforce
  • Innovation
  • Living standards
  • Cultural diversity
  • Economic opportunities
  • Global crisis
What to do next:
Look at other essays: