Developing countries require international organizations' help. Some people prefer financial aid while others think practical aid and advice are better. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Developing
coutries
need support from international organizations to become a more Correct your spelling
countries
comprehend
and better society. The form of support Wrong verb form
comprehended
including
financial and practical where Replace the word
includes
people
find useful. In my opinion, while
both financial aid
and practical aid
are significant, practical aid
plays a greater role in making a critical change in developing countries.
Developing countries mostly rely on primary and secondary industry
to generate money Fix the agreement mistake
industries
such
as farming and making simple products in industries. Providing financial aid
can improve the financial situation of these countires
. Correct your spelling
countries
For example
, building infrasturctures
to produce energy for exchange and utilizing technologies to increase the effectiveness of production and farming. Correct your spelling
infrastructures
infrastructure
However
, financial aid
could not teach citizens about methods or frameworks that they could use to create other things.
Practical aid
and advice serves
as a guide for Change the verb form
serve
people
in developing coutries
. Education is one of the Correct your spelling
countries
example
. Under education, Change to a plural noun
examples
people
directly learn from lessons and can teach others to pass on knowledge. Knowledge and skills will grow when applying
to Wrong verb form
applied
real life
situations. Add a hyphen
real-life
People
develop problem-solving skills throughout the process of learning.
In conclusion, although
financial resources are useful, they will be used up one day. The best way is to learn the method to generate more resources instead
of receiving financial aid
. Practical aid
is a better way for people
to learn and develop by
their own.Change preposition
on
Submitted by asllchkied on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
Your essay effectively covered both perspectives on the topic, but it could benefit from more specific examples to strengthen your arguments. Providing concrete examples can make your points more convincing and clear.
task achievement
Some of your main points lack detailed explanations. For instance, you mentioned financial aid and its benefits, but it would be helpful to elaborate on how practical aid specifically impacts individuals and communities in developing countries.
coherence cohesion
Ensure your paragraphs are well-developed. Each should contain a clear topic sentence, supporting sentences, and a concluding sentence. This structure will enhance the flow of your essay and make your arguments clearer.
task achievement
Your introduction and conclusion are clear and relevant. They effectively frame your essay and restate your main points.
task achievement
You presented a balanced view by discussing both financial and practical aid before expressing your own opinion. This demonstrates an understanding of the question and task.
coherence cohesion
The essay is generally well-organized, with a logical progression of ideas. Your transitions between paragraphs are smooth, helping to maintain coherence.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.