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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table below gives details of world electricity production by renewable sources in the four years between 2009 and 2012. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and making comparisons where relevant.

The table below gives details of world electricity production by renewable sources in the four years between 2009 and 2012. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and making comparisons where relevant.
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The table presents information about the percentages of renewable
energy
Use synonyms
 resources in the UK and the number of
workers
Use synonyms
 in 2009. It appears that methods of
energy
Use synonyms
 generation related to water are more effective
due to
Linking Words
 lower expenses. Hydropower,
in particular
Linking Words
, generated the greatest amount of
energy
Use synonyms
 with the smallest number of employees,
while
Linking Words
 solar power produced the least amount of
energy
Use synonyms
 with a larger workforce. In 2009, hydropower was responsible for 13.7% of the UK's renewable
energy
Use synonyms
, employing only 1,013
workers
Use synonyms
, making it the most efficient in terms of workforce utilization.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, Wind
energy
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
 demonstrated efficiency, producing 10.2% of the renewable
energy
Use synonyms
 with 1,198 employees.
In contrast
Linking Words
, solar
energy
Use synonyms
, which employed the most significant number of
workers
Use synonyms
 at 12,450, accounted for only 3.6% of the renewable
energy
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, Tidal and geothermal energies had similar contributions, with 6.8% and 6.9% respectively, but geothermal
energy
Use synonyms
 required more
workers
Use synonyms
 4,590 compared to tidal
energy
Use synonyms
 2,034

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words energy, workers with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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