In the future, people may no longer be able to pay things in shops using cash. All payments may have to be made by card or using phone. Do you think this will happen one day? Why do you think some people might not be happy to give up using cash?
It is estimated that in the coming days, online banking will take over the position of traditional one, and cash is predicted to
be vanished
. I tend to find myself among those who agree with Change to the active voice
vanish
have vanished
this
mindset which might be disapproved of by some residents due to
lack of knowledge.
It seems rational to accept that paper money will be replaced by digital payment techniques. One explanation to support this
point of view can be its impact on protecting the environment. To illustrate, it is contended that a great number of trees have been cut down to provide the central bank of the territories with sufficient sources for cash production. Therefore
, implementing a digital payment not only would save these trees, but it can also
lead to alleviating global warming indirectly. Another justification is owing to its security as well as
convenience for users. It means that with the help of this
technology, they can transfer a great amount of money which used to be a risky option with cash, thus
it has made it far easier to make big trades.
On the other hand
, there are some reasons that have been put forth by opponents of this
aspect of technology. They posit that some of the society members are not familiar with the process of using it. For instance
, a great deal of the residents in deprived areas, which include the majority of the territories, are struggling with basic needs for their lives, thus
such
a facility not only is inappropriate for them but also
it
can lead to more financial side effects. Another reason is the growing rate of internet hackers and online fraud which has brought about challenges to the user. Correct pronoun usage
apply
However
, I tend to disapprove of this
mindset as with some initial investments and improving security systems these hurdles can be mitigated.
In conclusion, the more the residents of communities adopt technology, the more they can save their time and the more promotion they can experience in life.Submitted by samirakasraee72 on
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task achievement
You have provided a well-rounded response to the task, tackling both the replacement of cash with digital payments and reasons why some people might oppose this change. To enhance your score, consider adding more specific examples or statistical data to strengthen your arguments.
coherence cohesion
While your ideas are clearly presented, there are some minor coherence issues. Ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea and flows smoothly to the next. Using more transitional phrases can help improve the logical structure of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion summarises your viewpoints well. However, try to make it slightly more reflective by reiterating the key points and implications discussed in the body.
task achievement
Your introduction effectively sets the stage for the discussion, clearly indicating your stance.
task achievement
You provide solid reasons for both sides of the argument, showing a balanced perspective.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion succinctly wraps up your argument, reinforcing your main point without redundancy.