IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

As most people spend a major part of their adult life at work, job satisfaction is an important element of individual wellbeing. What factors contribute to job satisfaction? How realistic is the expectation of job satisfaction for all workers?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is true that
satisfaction
Use synonyms
 in occupations is an essential factor in a person's well-being. There are several elements that contribute to
this
Linking Words
 and the expectation of
work
Use synonyms
satisfaction
Use synonyms
 is not realistic for all employees for various reasons. The first contributing feature of
job
Use synonyms
satisfaction
Use synonyms
 is personal interest, which plays an indispensable role in indicating the happiness of that worker.
For example
Linking Words
, it is evidence that employees who love their career because it suits their attention or interest tend to have a passion and energy to
work
Use synonyms
 regardless of how difficult the task is.
Consequently
Linking Words
, working with a passion leads to better performance, which is a standard requirement for employment
satisfaction
Use synonyms
 as no one would be happy if he could not perform well.
Moreover
Linking Words
, it is commonly believed that the workplace environment is
also
Linking Words
 relevant. To illustrate, working with a professional team and friendly colleagues would reduce stress and pressure from the assignment, which is related to
job
Use synonyms
satisfaction
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
, there are many reasons why the desire for
work
Use synonyms
satisfaction
Use synonyms
 will not be realistic.
Firstly
Linking Words
, there are too many factors that are out of control. To be more precise, it is not solely related to one single person, but it involves a third person
such
Linking Words
 as how co-workers behave.
Secondly
Linking Words
, nowadays, money is so important in daily life.
As a result
Linking Words
, people would consider it before their happiness or
satisfaction
Use synonyms
, regardless of how boring the
work
Use synonyms
 is.
Lastly
Linking Words
, some people wish to stay close to their family rather than worry about their
job
Use synonyms
satisfaction
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, there are a variety of elements relating to
job
Use synonyms
satisfaction
Use synonyms
, and it is not realistic, in my perspective, for all employees to achieve
job
Use synonyms
satisfaction
Use synonyms
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Your essay covers the main points well and stays on topic throughout. However, providing more detailed examples to illustrate your points can make your argument stronger.
coherence cohesion
Work on making your transitions between paragraphs smoother. Linking phrases can help in making the essay flow better from one point to the next.
coherence cohesion
Try to elaborate a bit more on certain points to show a deeper level of analysis and understanding. For example, explaining more about why personal interest is essential for job satisfaction can provide better support for your argument.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is well-organized and your points are clearly presented with a logical structure.
task achievement
You have successfully identified and discussed the main factors contributing to job satisfaction, as well as the realism of achieving it for all workers.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are effective in framing the essay and summarizing the main points.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • job satisfaction
  • wellbeing
  • contribute
  • meaningful work
  • work-life balance
  • career progression
  • workplace environment
  • recognition
  • constructive feedback
  • compensation
  • benefits
  • job security
  • autonomy
  • skills match
  • interests match
  • variety
  • challenge
  • economic conditions
  • labor market
  • individual expectations
  • job role
What to do next:
Look at other essays: