Some people say that parents have the most important role in child’s development. However, others argue that other things like television or friends have the most significant influence. Discuss both of view and give your opinion

At the present time, some members of society believe that
parents
play a significant role in their offspring's lives .
While
others say, external factors like television or friends influence them. The fact that the trend has some demerits, I would argue there are more merits.
This
essay explores how the benefits of a child's development with
step-parent
Correct article usage
a step-parent
show examples
outweigh external resources. On the one hand, there are several advantages of developing youngsters with their mom and dad. The principal positive is that producers provide the first learning environment. A clear example can be seen in the instil morals and manners from a young age because
parents
have the ability to guide them.
Additionally
, an article published by Al Watan- revealed that "
parents
teach their offspring the essential skills in first years,
for instance
, language and culture.
On the other hand
, there are some resources to develop young age associated with television and
blood brothers
Correct your spelling
Blood Brothers
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. First and foremost, television introduces a variety of cultures and languages.To demonstrate more, young requires bad or good ideas. Another possible factor is that
cooeagues
Correct your spelling
colleagues
who have social skills and a group of interests.
Consequently
, everyone should manage their behaviour. In conclusion, there are strong arguments on both sides.
Therefore
, I strongly believe that the superiorities of merits development of teenagers with
parents
outnumber friends and technology. The community should be balanced between two sides because each one completes the others.
Submitted by lailakhalil3 on

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task achievement
Ensure that the introduction accurately reflects the content of the essay. You mentioned demerits and merits, but the discussion was mainly about influences on child's development.
task achievement
Ensure consistency in using singular or plural forms and avoid minor grammatical errors for greater clarity and readability.
coherence and cohesion
Improve the transition between paragraphs to enhance the logical flow of ideas.
task achievement
Expand on specific examples that illustrate the points made, providing greater depth and comprehension.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear discussion of both sides of the argument concerning the influences on a child's development.
task achievement
The use of an article reference adds credibility and support to the main points discussed.
coherence and cohesion
The essay is generally well-organized with structured paragraphs for each main point.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • initial influence
  • learning environment
  • essential life skills
  • instill morals and manners
  • external factors
  • introduce to a variety of cultures
  • social skills
  • monitor the content
  • maintain a central role
  • exposure to different ideas
  • complement parental teaching
  • broader understanding
  • critical thinking skills
  • foundational groundwork
  • prominent influence
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