In many countries, smoking is now illegal in public places. Many people believe that such a ban is justified. Do you agree or disagree?

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It is argued that Consuming cigarettes should be banned by governments in public areas despite the effects it has on other individuals' freedom. I strongly agree with
this
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statement because smoking can damage
people
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's health.
Also
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, it may influence other
people
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to try it, if it is used publicly. Smoking is not only harmful to
people
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who are consuming it, but it is
also
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harmful to
people
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who are sitting near them. It can lead to chronic diseases
such
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as cancer and diabetes.
Also
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, the smoke which comes from cigarettes can affect the lungs of
people
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who sit near the smoker.
Therefore
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, it should be prohibited to smoke in public places.
For instance
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, in the USA many
people
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who have chronic disease in their lungs are passive smokers, but the disease comes from their exposure to smoke from the active ones. Another reason why smoking in public spaces should be restricted is that it may persuade others to consume it. Sometimes when
people
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see other
people
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smoking, they start to ask themselves that everyone is smoking and why not me?
This
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can cause them to try it and soon become addicted to it.
For example
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, a large number of
people
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in the USA claimed that they had started smoking with their friends in cafes. In conclusion, smoking in front of other
people
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is a dangerous thing for it causes chronic health conditions and it may double the number of individuals who consume it, so the government should put regulations against those who are addicted to it.
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task achievement
The introduction sets the context but could be clearer. For instance, more elaboration on the 'effects on other individual's freedom' would be helpful.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on one main idea and is well-developed with supporting details. This will help improve the logical flow and structure of the essay.
task achievement
The essay maintains a clear position throughout and effectively supports it with relevant examples.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion is strong, summarizing the key points and reiterating the position taken in the essay.
task achievement
The examples provided are specific and relevant, strengthening the arguments made.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • secondhand smoke
  • prevalence
  • respiratory issues
  • environmental pollution
  • litter
  • healthcare costs
  • smoking-induced illnesses
  • encourage smokers to quit
  • public health improvement
  • justified
  • public spaces
  • exposure
  • non-smokers
  • inconvenience
  • younger populations
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