Car ownership has increased so rapidly over the past 30 years that many cities in the world are now one big traffic jam. How true do you think this statement is? What measures can governments take to discourage people from using their cars?

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Heavy traffic congestion problems have been surging
due to
Linking Words
increasing car ownership over the
last
Linking Words
3 decades. In my view, that statement is totally right since it can be proved by
air
Use synonyms
pollution from
Use synonyms
cars'emmision
Correct your spelling
emissions
and the government should construct public transportation systems and build a friendly commuter for walking and cycling.
Air
Use synonyms
pollution is one the toughest problems for many urban areas because vehicles
releases
Change the verb form
release
show examples
thousands of emissions into the
air
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which could
be damaged
Wrong verb form
damage
show examples
local health residents.
For example
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, a constant stop-and-go- go in traffic jams leads to higher fuel consumption and increases releasing carbon
dixode
Correct your spelling
dioxide
diode
into the
air
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that people staying around breathe polluted
air
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which may cause lung cancer or related
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
lung diseases. The government should focus on building public transportation for residences
such
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as extending the grid of buses, and highway trains to decrease the demand for private
cars
Use synonyms
.
For instance
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, when commuters can easily access public transport, they choose to use it as a usual moving solution.
Consequently
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, they don't have any private
cars
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due to
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the tough parking slots nearby.
Additionally
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, building safe bike lanes and pedestrian-friendly
structure
Fix the agreement mistake
structures
show examples
can
also
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reduce reliance on
cars
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while
Linking Words
encourage
Change the verb form
encouraging
show examples
people to do more physical exercise like walking, and cycling daily to their destinations. It could reduce a million of dollars in medical bills and save a clean environment for inhabitants. Car ownership demand has increased for the
last
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30 years,
it
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
leads to humans
face with
Wrong verb form
facing
show examples
heavy traffic and
air
Use synonyms
pollution from vehicle emissions.
Consequently
Linking Words
, the government should start to upgrade the public transportation systems
as well as
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build safety routes for commuters.
Submitted by elizaluu94 on

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task response
The essay addresses the prompt well, but some points could be developed further. For instance, the discussion on air pollution could include more varied impacts, and the suggestions for government actions could provide more specific examples or data.
coherence cohesion
Work on improving grammatical accuracy and lexical resource to enhance readability. Pay attention to errors such as 'cars'emmision' and 'a friendly commuter for walking and cycling.' These distract the reader and can affect overall clarity.
coherence cohesion
The essay would benefit from better paragraph transitions and a more logical flow of ideas. Linking phrases can be used more effectively to connect the points.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clear and provide a good framework for the essay. The main points are stated and summarized well.
task response
Good use of specific examples, such as the impact of air pollution from vehicle emissions and the suggestion to build bike lanes and pedestrian-friendly structures.
task response
The writer shows a good understanding of the issue and suggests feasible government measures to tackle the problem.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • car ownership
  • traffic congestion
  • urban areas
  • commuters
  • environmental health
  • public transportation systems
  • incentives
  • carpooling
  • electric vehicles
  • taxes and fees
  • bike lanes
  • pedestrian-friendly infrastructure
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