IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

You are advised to spend about 20 minutes on this task. The first chart below shows how energy is used in an average Australian household. The second chart shows the percentage of greenhouse gas emissions which result from this energy use. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. »

You are advised to spend about 20 minutes on this task. The first chart below shows how energy is used in an average Australian household. The second chart shows the percentage of greenhouse gas emissions which result from this energy use. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. »
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These two charts give a comparison
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
 what
Use synonyms
energy consuming
Add a hyphen
energy-consuming
show examples
 household items
are use
Change the verb form
are used
show examples
, and how much
greenhouse
Use synonyms
gas
Use synonyms
 is produced from those items. from the first
chart
Add a comma
chart,
show examples
 we can see that "other appliances" are the most used, but from the second chart, it is a surprise to say that it is not the thing that produces the most
greenhouse
Use synonyms
gas
Use synonyms
, in fact, it's not even second. The category that produces the most
greenhouse
Use synonyms
gas
Use synonyms
 in Australia is actually heating and cooling, even though it's only the third when it comes to consuming
energi
Correct your spelling
energy
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the accumulative "other appliances" category uses the most
energy
Use synonyms
 but only comes third in producing
greenhouse
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
gas
Fix the agreement mistake
gases
show examples
. From these two charts, we can conclude that the amount of
energy
Use synonyms
 consumed by a certain group of household
piece
Fix the agreement mistake
pieces
show examples
 doesn't always correspond to the
greenhouse
Use synonyms
gas
Use synonyms
 produced by said group. We can see
this
Linking Words
 by the fact that
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the chart,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
states that the thing that consumes the most
energy
Use synonyms
 doesn't produce the most
greenhouse
Use synonyms
gas
Use synonyms
.

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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words energy, greenhouse, gas with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • average household
  • greenhouse gas emissions
  • energy use
  • percentage
  • chart
  • category
  • compare
  • disparity
  • proportion
  • corresponding
  • relative to
  • contribution
  • structured comparison
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