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Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

You bought a TV a week ago but when you got home you discovered it did not work properly.You called customer service to report the problem but you have not yet received any help.Write a letter to the company and in your letter:

#tv #week #home #work #customer #service #report #help #company
Dear Sir/Madam I am writing to complain about your
company
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company's
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 enterprise workers.
Firstly
, my full name is Komiljonova Komilaxon.I live in
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the center
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center
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centre
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 of Karshi and your company
has
Verb problem
is
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 located on the outskirts of the city of Karshi.A week ago,I bought a television
your
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from your
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 company.I found long desired
TV
 in your store.
Then
, I bought it and suddenly did not work when I got home and turned on the
TV
.I was suddenly surprised.How can a new
TV
 is not set to the correct input? A few moments later, I called customer service to report the problem.Customer services replied
me
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to me
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.They got my address and they asked about my problem.I explained everything to them.Customer services said: "We will go for two hours".But, four hours passed and they did not come.I suddenly panicked because I wanted to watch my favourite movie on the new
TV
.The most painful that I waited two days.
Nevertheless
,they still have not arrived.I got angry.Because I had not yet received any help.That's why I am writing you a letter of complaint.Why don't
your
Correct pronoun usage
you
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 serve your employees on time
.
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?
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 I look forward to receiving a full refund.You do not have to replace television.You must receive a full refund money. Yours sincerely Komiljonova Komilaxon
Submitted by omondavlat91 on

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coherence cohesion
While the letter includes all the necessary information, some details could be presented more clearly to enhance readability. Consider organizing your complaints more logically.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single idea. For example, separate the description of the problem with the TV from the lack of response from customer service.
task achievement
There is some inconsistency in your tone. Generally, it is polite but becomes more forceful at times. Try to maintain a consistent tone throughout.
coherence cohesion
The closing of your letter was polite and appropriate, making a strong professional impression.
task achievement
The letter successfully addresses all the points asked in the prompt, making it a complete response.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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