The pie charts below illustrate the percentages of people in five different employment situations in the country of Evonia over three age categories: 17-25 years old, 26-40 years old and 41-65 years old.

IELTS Writing Task Chart for The pie charts below illustrate the percentages of people in five different employment situations in the country of Evonia over three age categories: 17-25 years old, 26-40 years old and 41-65 years old.

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The

presented

Verb problem

apply

show examples

pie charts

shows

Change the verb form

show

show examples

the rates of people in five various occupation sectors in the

Use synonyms

and

Ashby

Use synonyms

it is clear that

Linking Words

Unemployment

Correct article usage

the Unemployment

show examples

percentage in the

Use synonyms

is lower than

Use synonyms

Ashby

Change preposition

in Ashby

show examples

by a roughly 4% difference.

Initially

Linking Words

, the two countries share similar percentages of workers in two employment situations, which are shop and office work, with only a 1% difference between them,

However

Linking Words

, construction work in

Ashby

Use synonyms

is significantly more popular than

the

Change preposition

in the

show examples

Use synonyms

as provided in the diagram above.

In addition

Linking Words

, personal service is

also

Linking Words

common

Correct quantifier usage

more common

show examples

Ashby

Use synonyms

than it is in Great Britain.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, despite the fact that

Ashby

Use synonyms

is higher in some areas, the United Kingdom is

performancing

Correct your spelling

performing

better in unemployment rates and technical work, which illustrates whether the country is developed or not,

also

Linking Words

the

Use synonyms

has a higher rate of professional workers.

To sum up

Linking Words

, Great Britain is doing better in settling down unemployment rates and increasing professional and technical workers,

on the other hand

Linking Words

Ashby

Use synonyms

has a large

amount

Change the quantifier

number

show examples

of employees

uccupating

Correct your spelling

occupation

in personal service.

yazanalt523Tue Aug 06 2024

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words uk, ashby with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: The word "difference" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

172 words

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The pie charts below illustrate the percentages of people in five different employment situations in the country of Evonia over three age categories: 17-25 years old, 26-40 years old and 41-65 years old.

It was common in the past for people to retire at 60. Now more and more people are choosing to continue working past the official retirement age, with some countries even increasing the official age of retirement. Do you agree or disagree with this change? Why?

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

International travel has many advantages to both travelers and the country visited. Do you think advantages outweigh disadvantages?

Some people believe that money spent on space research benefits all humanity. Others take the opposite view and say that money for this type of research is wasted. Discuss these 2 opinions / positions.