The chart and graph below give information about three categories of workers in Australia and the unemployment levels within those groups.

The chart and graph below give information about three categories of workers in Australia and the unemployment levels within those groups.
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pie
chart
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and line
chart
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illustrate the
percentage
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of employees in three different sectors in 2003 and the
unemployment
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rates within those groups over a 10-year
period
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.
Overall
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, in the pie
chart
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, the highest proportion of workers was in the "Born in Australia" category,
while
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the lowest was in the
ESC
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group
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. The line
chart
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shows a downward trend in
unemployment
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rates across all sectors, with the highest
rate
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observed in the
NESC
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group
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throughout the
period
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. In the pie
chart
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, in 2003, the highest
percentage
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of workers, accounting for 76%, belonged to the
Australian
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native section. The figure for the
NESC
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group
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was 14%, significantly lower than the highest
percentage
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. The lowest proportion of employees was in the
ESC
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group
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, at just 10%, which is one-seventh of the highest
percentage
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. Regarding the line graph, in 1993, the
NESC
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group
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had the highest
unemployment
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rate
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in Australia, standing at 7.5%, followed by the
Australian
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and
ESC
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sectors with 4% and 3.5%, respectively.
Although
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the
unemployment
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rate
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for the
NESC
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group
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dramatically decreased to 3% by the end of the observed
period
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, it still had the highest
rate
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of underemployment.
While
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the
unemployment
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rate
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for the
ESC
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group
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slightly declined from 3.5% to 2.5%, the
rate
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for the
Australian
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sector fluctuated and eventually dropped to 1%, which is one-fourth of its initial
rate
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. In conclusion, the highest proportion of employees in 2003 was in the "Born in Australia" category,
while
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the lowest was in the
ESC
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group
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. Over the ten-year
period
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, the
NESC
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group
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consistently had the highest
unemployment
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rate
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, despite a significant decrease,
while
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the
Australian
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sector experienced the lowest
rate
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by the end of the
period
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.
Submitted by cathyngo1512 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words chart, percentage, unemployment, period, esc, group, rate, nesc, australian with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "give" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 5 times.
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "significantly" was used 2 times.
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