IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

The charts below the protein and calorie intakes of people in different parts of the world. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

#protein #calorie #intakes #people #parts #world #information #features #comparisons
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The below chart shows information about the percentage of average
protein
Use synonyms
intake
Use synonyms
 of people. The bar chart illustrates
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 number of
calories
Use synonyms
 consumed by people,
overall
Linking Words
, the percentage of
protein
Use synonyms
intake
Use synonyms
 in North
America
Use synonyms
 is highest in 4
countries
Use synonyms
.
Similarly
Linking Words
, North
America
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
 is the largest country
consumes
Correct pronoun usage
that consumes
show examples
calories
Use synonyms
 above In the four
countries
Use synonyms
, North
America
Use synonyms
 exceeds standard
protein
Use synonyms
intake
Use synonyms
 with 62% for animal
protein
Use synonyms
 and 18% for other
protein
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 3
countries
Use synonyms
 : Latin
America
Use synonyms
, East Africa and India
also
Linking Words
 just have under ideal
protein
Use synonyms
 consume about a total of 45% for Latin
America
Use synonyms
, 31% for East Africa, and 28% for India,respectively. At the same time, North
America
Use synonyms
 is the top 1 in average calorie consumption specific with 3500
calories
Use synonyms
 higher than ideal calorie
intake
Use synonyms
, and
then
Linking Words
 Latin
America
Use synonyms
 with 2900
calories
Use synonyms
, East Africa with 2300
calories
Use synonyms
 and
finally
Linking Words
 is India the country with least
calories
Use synonyms
intake
Use synonyms
 in 4
countries
Use synonyms
 about 2000
calories
Use synonyms
Submitted by lyhuongclc on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

introduction conclusion present
Make sure to have a clear and concise introduction and conclusion. This will help in providing a framework for the essay and summarizing key points.
logical structure
Improve paragraph structure by ensuring each paragraph covers a single main idea supported by relevant details. This will enhance clarity and coherence.
relevant specific examples
Work on providing more specific details and examples to support your main points. This creates a more comprehensive and convincing argument.
logical structure
Use conjunctions and linking words to connect your points more smoothly, which will improve the flow of the essay and make it easier to read.
complete response
You've provided a complete response to the question by covering both protein and calorie intake across different regions.
relevant specific examples
You included relevant and specific figures, which helps in giving a clear comparison between the regions.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: