IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

the most important aim of science be improve people lives to what extend agree or disagree

#aim #science #people #lives
The
in
Correct your spelling
is
show examples
 no denying the fact about the
important
Replace the word
importance
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 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
science
 and the
grow
Replace the word
growth
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 of technology
make
Fix the infinitive
to make
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 the
lives
 of people better. The new scientist
discover
Change the verb form
discovers
show examples
 a
lot
 of
drages
Correct your spelling
drugs
 to health many
disease
Change to a plural noun
diseases
show examples
,
such
 as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 the difficult immunity
disesa
Correct your spelling
disease
dishes
.
In addition
, the new technology built
bu
Correct your spelling
by
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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science
 improves the
dignoses
Correct your spelling
diagnoses
diagnosis
 of the doctor
make
Wrong verb form
making
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 it more easy and helpful.
Also
,
produce
Wrong verb form
producing
show examples
 the vaccine for the people
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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will
helpful
Replace the word
help
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 to decrease any viruses
will
Correct pronoun usage
that will
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 come
in
Change preposition
into
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 the
word
Correct your spelling
world
show examples
.
The scientist
Correct article usage
Scientist
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 accomplished many things not only in the human
lives
Fix the agreement mistake
life
show examples
 stage
such
 as animals and plants.
Also
, change the genes in animals or plants to have better results. Like to improve the fruit and make it
bugger
Correct your spelling
bigger
show examples
 and more healthy.
Furthermore
, now the cow produces a
lot
 of milk and chees than
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 past
this
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
because of the growth of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
science
.
Furthermore
, the
word
Correct your spelling
world
show examples
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 many mystery only can discovered by
the
Correct article usage
apply
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scientists.
The
Correct article usage
Science
show examples
science
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
 transport from country to
anther
Correct your spelling
another
show examples
more fast
Replace the words
faster
show examples
,
this
the
Add a missing verb
is the
show examples
anather
Correct your spelling
another
 side of the
science
 many people do not know about.In
chimestry
Correct your spelling
chemistry
, develop the
chimecal
Correct your spelling
chemical
 to use in a
lot
 of
functional
Replace the word
functions
show examples
 in our life. In conclusion, I agree the important to have a
lot
 of focus
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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human
lives
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
, the
science
 has many different sides.
However
, the
science
 in
every thing
Correct your spelling
everything
show examples
,and every side of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
science
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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 a specific job to make our
lives
 better. If
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
science
 has the full focus only
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 human
live
Replace the word
life
show examples
,
then
will
Correct pronoun usage
there will
show examples
 be no balance in our
word
Correct your spelling
world
show examples
.
Submitted by modhialarjani1999 on

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coherence cohesion
The essay would benefit from a clearer and more focused thesis statement in the introduction to set the stage for the argument.
coherence cohesion
Make sure the ideas in each paragraph follow a logical order and connect more smoothly. Transitions between paragraphs and within the paragraphs can help with this.
task achievement
Expanding on ideas and providing more details could enhance clarity and comprehensiveness. Try to elaborate more on the points mentioned, providing specific examples where possible.
task achievement
Polishing language and grammar will enhance readability and make the essay more professional. Consider reviewing subject-verb agreement, verb tense consistency, and sentence structure.
coherence cohesion
The essay touches on several important aspects of how science improves lives, demonstrating an understanding of the topic.
task achievement
The ideas presented are relevant to the question and reflect a good attempt to cover different facets of the impact of science.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • crucial role
  • technological advancements
  • medical discoveries
  • life-changing inventions
  • innovations
  • solutions to human problems
  • enhancing quality of life
  • improvement of healthcare
  • transportation
  • communication
  • agriculture
  • energy sectors
  • eradication of diseases
  • prolongation of life expectancy
  • global challenges
  • climate change
  • overpopulation
  • food security
  • developed world
  • underprivileged communities
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