IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The line graph shows the percentages of Australian exports with four countries. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant You should write at least 150 words.

The line graph shows the percentages of Australian exports with four countries. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant You should write at least 150 words.
#line #percentages #australian #exports #four #countries #information #features #comparisons
The line chart below illustrates the proportion of Australian
exports
 to four different countries between 1990 and 2012.
Overall
, it can be seen that at the
beginnig
Correct your spelling
beginning
 of the given
period
Add a comma
period,
show examples
exports
 to
Japan
is
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
dominated
Replace the word
dominant
show examples
, but close to the
end
 of
this
 time
exports
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
china
Capitalize word
China
show examples
 demonstrated an increase and reached
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 peak
at the
end
. At the start of the given
period
, Australian
exports
 with
Japan
 saw the
greates
Correct your spelling
greatest
 rate with just under 25%,
while
exports
 to the US took the second place. From 1990 to around 2007 the percentage of
exports
 to
Japan
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
dominated
Replace the word
dominant
show examples
, but decreased slightly from above 25% to just around 18%,
whereas
,
exports
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
 India increased moderately
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 the same time, and
after
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
reached
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 peak in 2012 with approximately 28% and
exports
 into
Japan
 continued to decline to the
end
 of
this
period
. Regarding
to
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
the other 2 countries, the proportion of
exports
 with the US fluctuated over time
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and decreased from 10 % to around 5 %
at the
end
 of the
period
.
Additionally
, there was
an
Change the article
a
show examples
 slight increase from 1990 to 2010 in the percentage of
australian
Change the capitalization
Australian
show examples
exports
 with India from below 5 % to roughly 7 %,
however
Add a comma
however,
show examples
 it declined again from 2010 to 2012 by around 2 %.
Submitted by talgattan4ez on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "at the end".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words exports, period, japan, end with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "decline" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: