IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The line graph shows the percentages of Australian exports with four countries. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

The line graph shows the percentages of Australian exports with four countries. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant
#line #percentages #australian #exports #four #countries #information #features #comparisons
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The line chart below illustrates the proportion of Australian
exports
Use synonyms
 to four different countries between 1990 and 2012.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that at the
beginnig
Correct your spelling
beginning
 of the given
Use synonyms
period
Add a comma
period,
show examples
exports
Use synonyms
 to
Japan
Use synonyms
is
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
dominated
Replace the word
dominant
show examples
, but close to the
end
Use synonyms
 of
this
Linking Words
 time
exports
Use synonyms
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
china
Capitalize word
China
show examples
 demonstrated an increase and reached
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 peak
at the
Linking Words
end
Use synonyms
. At the start of the given
period
Use synonyms
, Australian
exports
Use synonyms
 with
Japan
Use synonyms
 saw the
greates
Correct your spelling
greatest
 rate with just under 25%,
while
Linking Words
exports
Use synonyms
 to the US took the second place. From 1990 to around 2007 the percentage of
exports
Use synonyms
 to
Japan
Use synonyms
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
dominated
Replace the word
dominant
show examples
, but decreased slightly from above 25% to just around 18%,
whereas
Linking Words
,
exports
Use synonyms
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
 India increased moderately
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 the same time, and
after
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
reached
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 peak in 2012 with approximately 28% and
exports
Use synonyms
 into
Japan
Use synonyms
 continued to decline to the
end
Use synonyms
 of
this
Linking Words
period
Use synonyms
. Regarding
to
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
the other 2 countries, the proportion of
exports
Use synonyms
 with the US fluctuated over time
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and decreased from 10 % to around 5 %
at the
Linking Words
end
Use synonyms
 of the
period
Use synonyms
.
Additionally
Linking Words
, there was
an
Change the article
a
show examples
 slight increase from 1990 to 2010 in the percentage of
australian
Change the capitalization
Australian
show examples
exports
Use synonyms
 with India from below 5 % to roughly 7 %,
Linking Words
however
Add a comma
however,
show examples
 it declined again from 2010 to 2012 by around 2 %.
Submitted by talgattan4ez on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "at the end".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words exports, period, japan, end with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "decline" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: