In the future, people may no longer be able to pay for things in shops using cash. All payments may have to be made by card or using phones. Do you think this will happen one day? Why do you think some people might not be happy to give up using cash?

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With Technological advancement, it is evident that physical money will be replaced with digital

payment

Use synonyms

However

Linking Words

, elderly people would not be satisfied with using these new means of

payment

Use synonyms

as they are unfamiliar with technology and

they

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

have conservative personalities. First of all, credit cards and bank applications are so convenient , safe and environmentally friendly .

In other words

Linking Words

, there is a risk of robbery and theft in cash purchasing,

however

Linking Words

, individuals easily can block their accounts in case of any unforeseen dangers in their digital payments.

For example

Linking Words

, my mother’s wallet was stolen several times in the subway.

Moreover

Linking Words

, all credit cards have passwords which guarantee their immunity, so nobody can misuse them

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

if they are stolen or lost. Needless to mention, printing notes has a negative impact on the ecosystem because trees and water should be used to produce paper.

Although

Linking Words

technology can facilitate human lives, the older generation may not adapt themselves properly

with

Change preposition

show examples

this

Linking Words

innovation.

For instance

Linking Words

, my grandfather is not able to use smartphones, let alone bank applications.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, they have the misconception that online

payment

Use synonyms

is not safe and secure

due to

Linking Words

the risk of cyber-attacks. The risk could be mitigated by some conservative actions including setting powerful passwords. In a nutshell,

due to

Linking Words

upgrading technology, cash

payment

Use synonyms

will be obsolete in the near future and the new innovative methods will play a significant role in the management of financial transactions. It is very important to educate people especially senior ones to use these new methods safely.

zohmoz93Sat Aug 10 2024

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task achievement

While your essay presents clear and comprehensive ideas, try to provide more specific examples and statistical data to strengthen your argument.

coherence cohesion

The logical structure of your essay is well-organized, however, ensure that transitions between paragraphs are smoother to enhance readability.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a strong introduction and conclusion. However, to make the conclusion more impactful, consider summarizing the key points discussed in the essay.

task achievement

You have successfully addressed the prompt and provided a complete response to the question.

coherence cohesion

The essay is logically structured and flows well from one point to the next.

task achievement

You have effectively used personal anecdotes which make your arguments relatable and add depth to your essay.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

255 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

digital payments
convenient
efficiency
reduce crime
tangibility
privacy
limited access to technology
job losses

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In the future, people may no longer be able to pay for things in shops using cash. All payments may have to be made by card or using phones. Do you think this will happen one day? Why do you think some people might not be happy to give up using cash?

Your opinion

Many people go through life doing work that they hate or have no talent for. Why does this happen? What are the consequences of this situation? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Health services should be free for everyone. Do you agree? Support your answer with explanation and examples.

The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people think governments should spend as much money as possible exploring outer space. Others argue they should spend the money for poor people. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people say that all popular TV entertainment programmes should aim to educate viewers about important social issues. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?