In the future, people may no longer be able to pay for things in shops using cash. All payments may have to be made by card or using phones. Do you think this will happen one day? Why do you think some people might not be happy to give up using cash?
With Technological advancement, it is evident that physical money will be replaced with digital
payment
. However
, elderly people would not be satisfied with using these new means of payment
as they are unfamiliar with technology and they
have conservative personalities.
First of all, credit cards and bank applications are so convenient , safe and environmentally friendly . Correct pronoun usage
apply
In other words
, there is a risk of robbery and theft in cash purchasing, however
, individuals easily can block their accounts in case of any unforeseen dangers in their digital payments. For example
, my mother’s wallet was stolen several times in the subway. Moreover
, all credit cards have passwords which guarantee their immunity, so nobody can misuse them ,
if they are stolen or lost. Needless to mention, printing notes has a negative impact on the ecosystem because trees and water should be used to produce paper.
Remove the comma
apply
Although
technology can facilitate human lives, the older generation may not adapt themselves properly with
Change preposition
to
this
innovation. For instance
, my grandfather is not able to use smartphones, let alone bank applications. Furthermore
, they have the misconception that online payment
is not safe and secure due to
the risk of cyber-attacks. The risk could be mitigated by some conservative actions including setting powerful passwords.
In a nutshell, due to
upgrading technology, cash payment
will be obsolete in the near future and the new innovative methods will play a significant role in the management of financial transactions. It is very important to educate people especially senior ones to use these new methods safely.Submitted by zohmoz93 on
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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
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task achievement
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coherence cohesion
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task achievement
You have effectively used personal anecdotes which make your arguments relatable and add depth to your essay.
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