IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people think that all university students should study whatever course they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

#people #university #students #study #course #subjects #future #science #technology
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Choosing
course
Add an article
a course
show examples
 in the
future
 had people arguing about whether universities
students
 should study their
favorite
Change the spelling
favourite
show examples
 courses only or study subjects that are beneficial for their
future
such
 as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
science and
technology related
Add a hyphen
technology-related
show examples
 topics, I believe that choosing a course that you are interested in ,
thus
 it is helpful for your
future
 is the best decision. Picking a subject you prefer to study is great , you will be studying it in a matter of curiosity and interest making
students
 motivated to learn more without boredom, which leads to a high chance of scoring good grades and becoming more successful. Studying the subjects
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
 without dropping
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
 later in the
future
.
for instance
 , studies confirmed that studying a topic in a matter of interest will make the human brain more productive which is the reason why it is important for your
future
.
On the other hand
 , subjects that are helpful for your
future
 should be studied , even if the
students
 don't like their choice , it is still worth it if it is good for their
future
.
That is
 the main purpose of university education, not
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
just studying courses that you prefer without taking note of
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 effectiveness in your
future
 career in order to be employed and successful. To be motivated
students
 tend to think about their
future
 rather than their interests , following what is essential.
To sum up
 . Both ways of choosing your course are beneficial if
students
 tend to use both methods, choosing something you are interested
Change preposition
in
show examples
while
 it's great for your
future
 is the best approach in order to pass university . Having a degree you are proud
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
 and useful for your career ,
preventing
Wrong verb form
prevents
show examples
 chances of dropping university or failing it .
Submitted by walaa200913 on

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coherence cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next with appropriate linking words and phrases. This will help in maintaining a logical structure throughout the essay.
task achievement
Develop the body paragraphs more comprehensively by providing specific and relevant examples or evidence to support the main points. This will enhance the task response and provide a clearer demonstration of your ideas.
general
Try to avoid grammatical errors and run-on sentences by breaking down ideas into shorter, more concise statements. This will contribute better to the clarity and readability of the essay.
intro conclusion
The introduction clearly presents the topic and the writer's opinion, setting the stage for the discussion.
task response
The essay addresses both viewpoints regarding the choice of university courses, indicating a balanced approach to the topic.
intro conclusion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main argument, reinforcing the writer's perspective in a clear manner.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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