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The graph shows the percentage of women working in 6 countries in 1960, 1970 and 1980. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting on th e main features and make comparisons where relevant

The graph shows the percentage of women working in 6 countries in 1960, 1970 and 1980. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting on th e main features and make comparisons where relevant
#percentage #women #countries #summarise #information #e #features #comparisons
The
given
Verb problem
apply
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bar chart shows the proportion of female
students
 enrolling in
a
Remove the article
apply
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higher education in five different countries
in
Change preposition
between
show examples
 1970 and 2005. The unit given is percentages.
Overall
, female enrollments rose drastically over the mentioned year in all five countries, especially in the UK
while
 Japan stood the lowest. Regarding female
students
 in 1970 , Canada accounted for 59%, marked the higher number among others. As in Germany, a close second with 50%.
In addition
, only a slight difference of 5% in those who were studying in the USA and the UK, 40% and 35%, respectively. The least was
japanese
Change the capitalization
Japanese
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 women with 20% candidates. Looking
in
Change preposition
at
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 2005, Canada remained the same with no changes
whereas
 the Germany female
students
 have a
slightly
Change the adverb
slight
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 increase to 55%.
Moreover
, a rise of more than a fifth of British female
students
 enrolled at the university
opposed
Correct word choice
as opposed
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 to the American just below a fifth
Change preposition
of freshman
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freshman
Fix the agreement mistake
freshmen
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.
Lastly
, Japan has a
doubled
Replace the word
double
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 figure (40%),
however
, still the least among
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
 five countries.
Submitted by tifjong on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words students with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "slight" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • employment rate
  • percentage
  • decade
  • increase/decrease
  • compare/contrast
  • significant
  • socio-economic factors
  • progressive
  • minimal changes
  • hypothesize
  • global developments
  • regional developments
  • influence
  • trend analysis
  • workforce participation
  • historical context
  • labor market
  • gender gap
  • employment policies
  • cultural norms
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