IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The line graph and pie chart below show information on crime in the UK for the last year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The line graph and pie chart below show information on crime in the UK for the last year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The given line graph indicates the relation
of
Change preposition
between
show examples
age
Use synonyms
 and
crime
Use synonyms
, and the pie chart presents four kinds of
crime
Use synonyms
 committed
last
Linking Words
 year in the UK. From the two
graphs
Add a comma
graphs,
show examples
it is clear that
Linking Words
 the
age
Use synonyms
 of most criminals ranged from 16 to 24 and the most committed
crime
Use synonyms
 type
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
 violent
crime
Use synonyms
. It is obvious that crimes started to be committed at the
age
Use synonyms
 of 12 at 5
tens
Use synonyms
 of
thousands
Use synonyms
, and the figure surged to 70
tens
Use synonyms
 of
thousands
Use synonyms
 at 16 years old.
In addition
Linking Words
, at the
age
Use synonyms
 of 20, the number reached a peak of 80
tens
Use synonyms
 of
thousands
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, the number commenced a downward trend from 24 years old at 60
tens
Use synonyms
 of
thousands
Use synonyms
. The rate tumbled to 20
tens
Use synonyms
 of
thousands
Use synonyms
 at 28 years old, and
then
Linking Words
 it went down stably to under 10
tens
Use synonyms
 of
thousands
Use synonyms
. Violent
crime
Use synonyms
 occupied the biggest share of the pie chart
by
Change preposition
at
show examples
 46
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
,
the
Correct word choice
and the
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 ratios of property
crime
Use synonyms
 and drug
crime
Use synonyms
 were similar at 22
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 and 23
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 respectively. The
last
Linking Words
 place is public order
crime
Use synonyms
 by 9
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words age, crime, tens, thousands, percent with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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