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The line graph indicated the information about the number of questionnaires collected from Tourist Information office in a city based on individual, letter/email and telephone by first 6 months in 2011.

The line graph indicated the information about the number of questionnaires collected from Tourist Information office in a city based on individual, letter/email and telephone by first 6 months in 2011.
#line #information #questionnaires #tourist #office #city #email #telephone #first #months
The present line graph shows how the data of surveys gathered from
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the visitors
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visitors
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visitors'
visitor's
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 information
office
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offices
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 in a region categorized by each person,
electronic-mail
Correct your spelling
electronic mail
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, and telephone in the first semester of 2011. From an
overall
 perspective, it can be seen that
in person
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in-person
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 and by telephone have
a
Correct article usage
apply
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similar upward
trends
Correct the article-noun agreement
trend
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,
while
 the letter/email approach experienced a reversed manner over the period shown. Examining the details, in the first
month
 of 2011,
face-to-face
Add an article
the face-to-face
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 method started as the lowest number at below 500, and in the next two
months
Add a comma
months,
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 it
has
Verb problem
apply
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a
Correct article usage
apply
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gradual increase
Replace the word
gradually increased
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 to exactly 800. For the next quartal, the data climbed significantly to almost 1900 in the
last
 of June, making it
as
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apply
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the highest number of questionnaires
within
Change preposition
among
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 the others.
Additionally
, in January, by call
placed
Add a missing verb
was placed
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as
Correct your spelling
was
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 the most preferable
tools
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tool
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, being more than 800 data.
However
, in the next
month
Add a comma
month,
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 there was a noticeable decline to exactly 800. There was
a
Remove the article
apply
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growth to 1000 in March and April
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and rose to 1600 in the
last
month
 listed on the graph.
In contrast
, the most interesting point was for the letter/email.
Although
 there were almost 800 favour writing types in the earlier, the trend witnessed a gradual decline to nearly 700 both in February and March
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and
continue
Wrong verb form
continued
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 dropping slightly to less than 400 in the
last
 two
month
Fix the agreement mistake
months
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. The total number made it
as
Correct word choice
apply
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the least
chose
Wrong verb form
chosen
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methods
Fix the agreement mistake
method
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 by people among others.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words month with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trends" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decline" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "gradual" was used 2 times.
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