Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
The most optimum method to mitigate growing traffic and pollution is to hike the prices of petrol. I, personally do not find
this
solution a considerable approach, hence
i
disagree with the statement.
First and foremost, Change the capitalization
I
increase
in the prices of Correct article usage
an increase
pertol
directly leads to inflation. Though it can boost Correct your spelling
petrol
economy
growth, Replace the word
economic
however
, it can be a major issue for the common man. An increase in petrol prices can affect the daily life of low-income individuals who use
their conveyance like cars, motorbikes
for daily commuting. Correct word choice
and motorbikes
Moreover
, such
middle-class families can never imagine to
having Change preposition
apply
good
lifestyle.
Add an article
a good
Consequently
, richer's become more
richer and poorer's become Change the word
apply
more poor
. Replace the words
poorer
This
solution can foster the gap between rich and poor, hence
a nation may deal with crises.
Alternatively, every individual must start taking the initiative to diminish the use
of their vehicles and start using public transport. It accelerates the use
of fewer vehicles, hence
less traffic leads to less emission of greenhouse gases. Additionally
, the government can also
add its crucial role by creating awareness through campaigns. People must be aware of the benefits of more use
of public transport. The government should also
focus on better public transportation facilities as might people not use
them due to
their inadequate and insufficient transportation infrastructure.
To Conclude
, I believe the most substantial way is not to hike the price of petrol but to improve the transportation infrastructure in its most comprehensive and efficient way. Such
initiatives would not cause adverse effects on a common person but help in creating a healthy environment.
inflation
economy growth though
a common person suffers
Correct your spelling
through
solution
can be Add an article
the solution
limit
Fix the infinitive
to limit
use
of Correct article usage
the use
Correct your spelling
vehicles
vechiles
awareness campaigns
Correct your spelling
vehicles
use
of public transportaion
Correct your spelling
transportation
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task achievement
Your essay presents a clear stance on the topic, which is a positive aspect. However, there are sections where the argumentation could be more robust. Try to include more detailed examples and evidence to support your points.
coherence cohesion
Some sentences could be streamlined for clarity and coherence. For example, the sentence: 'Though it can boost economy growth, however, it can be a major issue for the common man.' should be revised for smoother flow.
coherence cohesion
There are a few grammatical errors and awkward phrases that could be corrected. For example, 'Though it can boost economy growth' should be 'Though it can boost economic growth'. Paying closer attention to grammar and phrasing could help improve your overall score.
task achievement
Your argument against raising petrol prices is well articulated and you suggest an alternative solution, which is a strength of your essay.
coherence cohesion
The structure of your essay, including the introduction and conclusion, helps in presenting your ideas clearly. The conclusion effectively summarizes your stance.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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