Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
People have different views about whether
students
should be
focus on their main Unnecessary verb
apply
subjects
or learn about other subjects
. While
learning a new
Correct the article-noun agreement
a new subject
new subjects
subjects
sometimes be a good effect to
our resume, I believe that focusing and mastering in main Change preposition
on
subjects
are more important.
On the one hand, especially corparate compaines
want their Correct your spelling
corporate companies
employee's
as qualified as they could reach. Change noun form
employees
Thus
, in some job-markets
studying a new subject is Correct your spelling
job markets
the
one of the Correct article usage
apply
solution
to provide Change to a plural noun
solutions
employers
wishes. Change noun form
employers'
employer's
For instance
, if you are going to be a journalist in Turkey, you should be
study history or media Unnecessary verb
apply
for
make your resume stronger and enhance your Change preposition
to
knowladge
. I believe that Correct your spelling
knowledge
this
argument
generally true for social sciences in Add a verb
argument is
argument was
underpirivileged
communities. Because, social sciences Correct your spelling
underprivileged
does
not offer a good salary Change the verb form
do
especially
in middle or Add the comma(s)
, especially
low income
Add a hyphen
low-income
countires
, Correct your spelling
countries
so
Correct word choice
apply
students
try to improve their job oppurtinites
Correct your spelling
opportunities
learning
new Change preposition
by learning
subjects
in similar area
.
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
On the other hand
, it is perhaps even more important to
Change preposition
for to
students
focus on their main subject and being
Wrong verb form
be
a
almost professional in their work area. It does not matter if they study in social Correct article usage
apply
sicences
or sciences, every career candidate should make sure they learn particular Correct your spelling
sciences
science
subjects
and talented
in Add a missing verb
are talented
a
solving Correct article usage
apply
problem
in their main Fix the agreement mistake
problems
subjects
. If they do not became
a Change the verb form
become
pro
Fix the agreement mistake
pros
on
their main Change preposition
in
subjects
, when they applied
Wrong verb form
apply
in
Change preposition
for
job
, it does not matter how many graduate Add an article
the job
a job
dagree
they have.
In conclusion, I can understand why Correct your spelling
degree
degrees
students
being
Wrong verb form
are
stressful
about learning new Replace the word
stressed
subjects
, but it seems to me that a become
a Wrong verb form
becoming
porfeesional
in one subject always better in adult life.Correct your spelling
professional
Submitted by berivan_yilmazz on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph clearly links back to the main argument stated in the introduction.
task achievement
Use a wider range of vocabulary to express ideas more precisely and avoid repetition.
task achievement
Take care to correct grammatical errors and typos to improve readability.
task achievement
The essay presents both views effectively and provides a clear opinion in the conclusion.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well-crafted, providing a clear sense of the essay's direction and wrapping it up effectively.
task achievement
There are relevant examples, such as the reference to journalists in Turkey, which enrich the argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.