IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend. Do you agree or disagree?

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For decades, many places have followed the pattern of five working
days
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 and a two-day weekend.
However
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, there is a growing debate about extending the
weekends
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while
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 reducing the number of working
days
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. In my view, I firmly agree with
this
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 idea.
Firstly
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, extending
weekends
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 can boost economic development by encouraging more consumer spending.
It is clear that
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people
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’s consumption plays a key role in the economy. If
weekends
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 are longer, many more
people
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 will spend their free time shopping, watching movies, or
traveling
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travelling
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. With more consumers, industries
such
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 as retail, exhibition, and tourism can benefit.
As a result
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, these sectors may hire more workers and help increase employment.
Therefore
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, longer
weekends
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 are a wise and beneficial step for social and economic growth.
Secondly
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, reducing the working
week
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 improves
people
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’s well-being. Nowadays, many
people
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 suffer from prolonged working hours. In China,
for example
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,
people
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 in tech companies follow the “996” schedule, meaning working from 9.a.m. to 9.p.m., six
days
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 a
week
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.
Such
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 high-pressure working environments often lead to health conditions
such
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 as
lower-back
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lower back
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 pain. Reducing working
days
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 can help alleviate these issues.
In addition
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,
people
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 can spend more time with their families or focus on personal development, which may improve their productivity at work.
Thus
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, a shorter working
week
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 is a step forward for both employees and companies. In conclusion, a shorter working
week
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 and
a
Correct article usage
apply
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longer
weekends
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 not only benefit the economy but
also
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 enhance
people
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’s welfare.
This
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 change can lead to a better and more sustainable future for society.

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task achievement
Consider expanding on your supported main points by providing more specific examples or statistics to strengthen your arguments and make them more compelling.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that your introduction clearly outlines the main points that will be discussed in the essay to provide a roadmap for the reader.
coherence and cohesion
Try to vary your sentence structures to enhance the overall flow and engagement of your writing, which can improve coherence and keep the reader’s interest.
task achievement
Your essay demonstrates a clear stance on the topic and addresses both economic and personal well-being aspects effectively.
coherence and cohesion
The logical structure of your essay is strong, with clear paragraphs that transition smoothly, making it easy for the reader to follow your argument.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • productivity
  • burnout
  • motivation
  • mental well-being
  • work-life balance
  • job satisfaction
  • pollution levels
  • traffic congestion
  • consumer spending
  • economic implications
  • leisure and service sectors
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