With the advent of stream services online , fewer people go to the movie theater to see films what what are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend?

Online services
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
one of the
fast
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
developing
technology
Change to a plural noun
technologies
show examples
nowadays, which
was
Wrong verb form
is
show examples
the reason behind people preferring to watch movies online rather than
going
Wrong verb form
go
show examples
to the theatre.
This
essay will
be discussing
Wrong verb form
discuss
show examples
the benefits and drawbacks of
this
drift. On the one hand, more individuals tend to watch films online
due to
, the fact that it is more convenient
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
them.
For example
, it is easy
access
Add the particle
to access
show examples
, available resource all the time without restrictions, and no need to dress up or drive your car in order to reach the cinema.
In addition
,
it
Correct pronoun usage
one
show examples
does not need
special
Add an article
a special
show examples
ticket to watch it, all films are available for free for all age groups.
While
Correct word choice
On
show examples
on the other hand
, it denied people
from
Change preposition
apply
show examples
an extraordinary experience.
For instance
, watching the movie
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
a giant screen with tremendous speakers
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
uplift
Correct subject-verb agreement
uplifts
show examples
your
feeling
Fix the agreement mistake
feelings
show examples
to the extent that you feel living inside the movie.
Moreover
, the availability of
such
services had a fundamental effect
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
peoples
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
wasting their time,
while
spending long hours watching
a
Correct determiner usage
one
show examples
film after another, reaching the level of addiction. In conclusion, watching online
had
Wrong verb form
has
show examples
a good side
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
making life simpler.
However
Add a comma
However,
show examples
it
also
affected people negatively by
time wasting
Add a hyphen
time-wasting
show examples
and enjoyment deprivation.
Submitted by hazarbakhit on

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coherence cohesion
Work on improving the logical flow of ideas. While the essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, the transitions between points can be smoother. Consider using more cohesive devices to link ideas between paragraphs.
task achievement
Your response adequately addresses the prompt, but it can be made more comprehensive by elaborating on your points further. Provide more specific examples to strengthen your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph fully develops one main idea with supporting details. Some points feel underdeveloped and would benefit from further elaboration.
introduction conclusion present
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame the discussion effectively.
task achievement
The main points of the essay are relevant to the prompt and provide a balanced view of the advantages and disadvantages of online streaming services.

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