In today’s world, people spend a lot of money on appearance because they want to look younger. Why does this happen? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

#today’s #world #people #money #appearance #happen #development

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people

these days like to look younger and more health look, the

obseesion

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obsession

of being shining all the time was

unacpetcted

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unexpected

bacause

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because

of the nature of

humanity

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humanity's

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growth

and

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apply

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etc, but at the

precent

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present

time it all

change

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changes

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to be

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apply

show examples

neccesary

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necessary

surge for all

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apply

show examples

old

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the old

show examples

people

, the social media affect on everybody main and change their ideas about looking young and how much that gonna help them to be more attractive. most

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apply

show examples

people

Add an article

the people

show examples

now would like to spend

thousends

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thousands

and

thousends

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thousands

of money to get a specific shape which is a negative

developmet

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development

cacuse

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cause

why would you all want to have the same face and the same body shape if you have

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apply

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your own beautiful feature so on needed to change anything about who you are. In my

opinion

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opinion,

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people

need to get

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apply

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enough confidence about their own

feature

Fix the agreement mistake

features

show examples

and being

reallity

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reality

really

about who they are.

Submitted by h.b.s12301 on Sun Aug 25 2024

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coherence cohesion

Revise sentence structure to improve clarity and fluency. Avoid overly long sentences and ensure proper use of conjunctions.

task achievement

Develop your arguments more fully by providing specific examples or supplementary details. This will make your essay more convincing and comprehensive.

task achievement

The essay addresses the prompt by identifying the reasons why people spend money on appearance and takes a clear stance on the issue.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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0
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
22
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

152 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Cultural and social pressure
Youth and beauty glorification
Technological advancements
Anti-aging treatments
Skincare
Cosmetic procedures
Self-esteem and confidence
Self-improvement
Self-care
Unrealistic beauty standards
Superficiality
Financial strain
Consumption and dissatisfaction
Psychological effects
Anxiety and depression
Body dysmorphobia

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In today’s world, people spend a lot of money on appearance because they want to look younger. Why does this happen? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Fully explain your ideas

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Is there any event that is considered the most significant in impacting your life? What might have happened if that event had not occurred?

The percentage of overweight children in Western society has increased by almost 20% in the last ten years. Discuss causes and effects of this disturbing trends. Give your solution for the causes.

Fossil fuels, such as coal, oil and natural gas, are the main source for many countries. However, some nations are using alternative energy such as solar power and wind power. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Due to the development and rapid expansion of supermarkets in some countries, many small, local business are unable to compete. Some people thinkk that the closure of local business will bring about the death of local communities. To what extend do you agree or disagree?