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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below shows the total number of minutes (in billions) of telephone calls in the UK, divided into three categories, from 1995-2002.

The chart below shows the total number of minutes (in billions) of telephone calls in the UK, divided into three categories, from 1995-2002.
#minutes #billions #telephone #uk #three #categories
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The chart illustrates the duration of the total number of telephone calls in billions of minutes which were divided into three categories, local-fixed
line
Use synonyms
, national and
international - fixed
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international-fixed
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line
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 and
mobiles
Fix the agreement mistake
mobile
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all
Correct determiner usage
apply
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calls, in the UK, between 1995 and 2002. In the local - fixed
line
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, the
numbers
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 increased from 70
billion
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 in 1995 to 90
billion
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 in 1999, making it the highest phone call made.
However
Linking Words
, from 1999 to 2002 the
numbers
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 lowered steadily from 90
billion
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 and returned to 70
billion
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 just like in 1995. The national and international - fixed
line
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 started
under
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at under
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 40
billion
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 in 1995, but soon the
numbers
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 gradually rose
up
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apply
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to approximately 60
billion
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 by the year 2002.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the total duration from cell phones in 1995 was around 3 - 4
billion
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, making mobiles
as
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apply
show examples
the lowest
phone
Correct quantifier usage
number of phone
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 call made in the UK. By 2002, the
numbers
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 grew dramatically to around 42
billion
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. In conclusion,
with
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apply
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the national and international - fixed
line
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 and calls from cell phones had the same upward trend between 1995 to 2002, but both of them were still lower compared to the local - fixed
line
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 which though the
numbers
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 decreased in 2002
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
was still the highest.
Submitted by riani.the2 on

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 79%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words line, numbers, billion with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • total number
  • minutes
  • telephone calls
  • UK
  • divided into
  • categories
  • from
  • to
  • overall
  • increased significantly
  • local fixed-line calls
  • accounted for
  • largest proportion
  • throughout
  • period
  • international calls
  • highest rate of growth
  • experiencing
  • sharp increase
  • national long-distance calls
  • remained relatively stable
  • slight decline
  • towards
  • end
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