The graph below shows the unemployment rates in the US and Japan between March 1993 and March 1999

The graph below shows the unemployment rates in the US and Japan between March 1993 and March 1999
A glance at the provided line graph depicts the
level
of
unemployment
in the US and
Japan
over a period of 6 years.
Overall
,
although
the highlighted
level
decreased sharply in the
Us
Correct your spelling
US
show examples
,
this
level
increased steadily in
japan
Capitalize word
Japan
show examples
over
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
period shown.
In addition
, in 1993, the highest
level
of
unemployment
occurred in the
Us
Correct your spelling
US
show examples
a staggering 7%
in contrast
the mentioned rate was merely 2.5% in
japan
Capitalize word
Japan
show examples
. The thriving of
US
Correct article usage
the US
show examples
in terms of reducing
unemployment
Correct article usage
the unemployment
show examples
level
can be seen.
This
level
begun
Add the auxiliary verb
began
show examples
with
Change preposition
at
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
7% in 1993 and fell to just
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
5% in 1999. In stark contrast,
this
rate experienced
significant
Correct article usage
a significant
show examples
increased
Replace the word
increase
show examples
from 2.5% to over 5%. Both countries had some fluctuations during
this
period. it is noticeable that prior to 1998 the
level
of
unemployment
in the
Us
Correct your spelling
US
show examples
was considerably higher than
Japan
Change preposition
in Japan
show examples
however
Japan
overtook in terms of
unemployment
level
in 1998.
Submitted by speher2000behroozifar on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words level, unemployment, japan with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Unemployment rate
  • Trend
  • Comparison
  • Period
  • Sharp increase/decrease
  • Correlation
  • Economic policies
  • Technological advancements
  • Global economic conditions
  • Consumer spending
  • Social welfare
  • Public sentiment
  • Predictions
  • Economic strategies
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!