Some people think that professional sports players earn too much salary, especially when they do not seem to help peopleand societies the way people of other occupations such as doctors, teachers, and soldiers do. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
✍️ Want to check your own essay?Write on this topic → Introduction
Some individuals
arguedWrong verb form
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that sportsmen have higher
thenReplace the word
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any other field in society
as
teacherFix the agreement mistake
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, doctors and so on. In my contend, I
am Unnecessary verb
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disagree with
statement.
Body paragraph 1
with, sportsmen play only for
shortAdd an article
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time period,
most
of Change preposition
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the Correct article usage
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sportsmen take early retirement.
, they deserve
higherAdd an article
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salary. A recent survey conducted by Time News of India
in Change preposition
show examples
which they Correct pronoun usage
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showed the majority of
the Correct article usage
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playerFix the agreement mistake
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take retirementWrong verb form
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in their early 40s.
Conclusion
, the
work for the name and fame of the country. Good
give fame to their country
through Change preposition
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worldwide.
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Ensure a proper and clear introduction and conclusion to strengthen your argument. Both parts are crucial for outlining your main ideas and summarizing your points effectively.
Expand on your points with more specific examples and evidence. This will enhance the clarity of your ideas and arguments, making them more compelling and solid.
Work on forming more complex sentences to enrich your essay's coherence and cohesiveness. Transition words and varied sentence structures can greatly improve the flow.
You raised relevant points about the comparatively short career span of sportsmen and their contribution to their country’s fame. These are important aspects to consider.
Your essay shows a clear effort to address both sides of the argument, which is beneficial for task achievement.
Include an introduction and conclusion
A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.
The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.
The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:
- Summary
- Restatement of thesis
- Prediction or recommendation
Example:
To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.
Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:
- In conclusion
- To conclude
- To summarize
- Finally
- In a nutshell
- In general