Some people think that we should replace old buildings and houses in cities with more modern buildings. Other people think we should protect old buildings. Discuss both these views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

There is a controversial debate over old
buildings
in modern cities.
While
some people believe that they should be substituted, I side with the ones who prefer to preserve them.
This
essay will shed light on both perspectives and explain why conservation is a better option. Often, shining skyscrapers appear not only more aligned with the contemporary taste, but they seem more efficient in terms of energy
consumes
Replace the word
consumption
show examples
.
However
, hi-tech materials are not always
so
Correct word choice
as
show examples
performative as we might expect. The downsides of any contemporary innovation reside in the difficulties
to repair
Change preposition
of repairing
show examples
and, at the same time, the need
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
skilled workers for its
maintainance
Correct your spelling
maintenance
. One example is the Bosco Verticale in Milan, the complexity behind the installation of the vegetation system requires always experts on site. Traditional
buildings
, quite often are left in disrepair
therefore
their external appearance is not really attractive.
However
, these constructions show traditional techniques and the use of old materials.
Although
this
can be perceived as a negative aspect, thicker walls made with bricks,
wooden
Correct word choice
and wooden
show examples
structures are not only more efficient in terms of energy
consume
Replace the word
consumption
show examples
but
also
easier to repair. Here, conservation is possible and doable by non-graduated people.
Moreover
, replacing old
buildings
with new
buildings
means demolishing constructions and
disposing
Add the preposition
disposing of
show examples
huge
amount
Fix the agreement mistake
amounts
show examples
of waste
that is
very difficult to recycle. In conclusion, despite new modern
buildings
are often framed as nicer and ecologically efficient, the reality is that they are not
easily
Rephrase
as easily
show examples
reparable as the traditional ones, and their
effciency
Correct your spelling
efficiency
relies more on complex technologies than on simple construction techniques.
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task achievement
You have structured your essay well, with a clear introduction and conclusion. However, your argumentation around the advantages of modern buildings could be expanded a little more to provide a more balanced view.
coherence cohesion
Organize your arguments with more clear paragraphing. Use topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to help guide the reader.
task achievement
Incorporate more specific examples to support your points. While you mentioned the Bosco Verticale in Milan, additional examples can make your arguments more compelling.
task achievement
Your introduction is clear and sets out the debate well.
task achievement
Your conclusion is concise and summarizes your position effectively.
coherence cohesion
You have used a good range of vocabulary and complex sentence structures.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • paramount
  • evolutionary journey
  • tangible link
  • fostering
  • sense of belonging
  • architectural beauty
  • economic benefit
  • tourist attractions
  • preservation techniques
  • structural integrity
  • energy-efficient
  • sustainable architecture
  • cultural preservation
  • urban demands
  • contemporary lifestyles
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