Some people like to try new things, for example, places to visit and types of food. Other people prefer to keep doing things they are familiar with. Discuss both these attuitudes and give your won opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

#people #places #visit #food #attuitudes

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There is an ongoing debate regarding how experimenting should have the liberty to express their ideas without constraints. Some

people

Use synonyms

want to do new things, whether food types or exploring new places.

While

Linking Words

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

some of them oppose it and prefer to do familiar things. the following paragraph sheds light on both perspectives which will lead to a logical conclusion. on the one hand,

people

Use synonyms

are getting tired of doing the same task in their daily routine and there are myriads of reasons to do something new.

Firstly

Linking Words

, when a person follows the as-it-is pattern of lifestyle, it becomes a

man

Use synonyms

hectic and exotic increasing blood pressure and anxiety.

Besides

Linking Words

, something new makes a

man

Use synonyms

healthy and happy to visit a new area to experiment with the food and their variety.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, random changes can strengthen their minds, about how to tackle the situation and become more confident.

For instance

Linking Words

, in 2023 Tim Horton opened their branch in Lahore Pakistan, and 150

people

Use synonyms

stood to eat the croissant and drink coffee.

Therefore

Linking Words

, cheating with the old stuff sometimes makes a very useful to do something different.

on the other hand

Linking Words

, following the same routine makes a

man

Use synonyms

punctual and responsible,

that

Correct pronoun usage

who

show examples

never loses any customer.

However

Linking Words

, the older generation hesitates to eat the food because sometimes it is contagious to their health like junk foods, or

traveling

Change the spelling

travelling

show examples

affects their body posture and aches in the backbone and muscle cramps.

for example

Linking Words

, the founder of Microsoft always follows the same eating habits and he is not able to try something different.

Therefore

Linking Words

, keeping the same thing makes a

man

Use synonyms

stronger, and healthier, and improves personal skills.

to sum up

Linking Words

, for the aforementioned aspects, both habits are good for different ages

people

Use synonyms

. there is a balance between approaches.

According to

Linking Words

me, both are good for different lifestyles

Correct word choice

and community

show examples

community

Fix the agreement mistake

communities

show examples

and

beneficial

Add a missing verb

are beneficial

show examples

for life.

Submitted by alviusman18 on Sat Sep 07 2024

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Your essay addresses the main points of the topic, presenting arguments for both trying new things and sticking to familiar routines. However, there are areas that need improvement for a higher score. 1. Task Response: Ensure that your examples are relevant and clearly support the points you're making. Mention more specific experiences or data. Also, ensure that you directly address the prompt's requirement to

advice

clearly state your own opinion" in the conclusion by making it more explicit. 2. Coherence and Cohesion: Organize your essay better by ensuring each paragraph has a clear central idea. Improve the logical structure by using linking phrases effectively to connect ideas smoothly. For example, "On the one hand" could be followed by "On the other hand" to clearly juxtapose ideas. 3. Grammar and Language: Make sure to capitalize the first letter of sentences and proper nouns (e.g., "On" instead of "on", "Microsoft" instead of "microsoft"). Also, check for sentence structure and punctuation errors to improve clarity.

positive

You have effectively addressed both perspectives on the topic, covering the main angles of the discussion.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

309 words

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Your opinion

“Prevention is better than the cure.” Researching and treating disease is too costly and so it would be better to invest in preventative measures. To what extend do you agree?

Being able to purchase goods from any places in the planet has made nations around the world become almost identical. Do you think this is a possitive or negative development?

Modern appliances in the home have become more common, leaving no doubt that advances in technology have improved our lifestyle. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It’s generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance, music and sport and others are not. However, it’s sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sportsperson or musician. Discuss both points of view and give your own opinion.