Social media helps people to keep in touch with friends and stay on top of news and events. Do you think the advantages of social media outweigh the disadvantages?
In the
last
decade, it is
extremely difficult for Wrong verb form
has been
people
to meet someone. However
, these day
, Change the determiner
this day
these days
the
development of social Change preposition
with the
media
, all of us can keep in touch with friends and update tops
of news and events easily. In my opinion, I assume that the pros of social Fix the agreement mistake
top
media
outweigh the cons due to
social media
not only save
timeCorrect subject-verb agreement
saves
,
but Remove the comma
apply
also
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
humalife
become better and Correct your spelling
humanity
quickly
.
Correct quantifier usage
more quickly
To begin
with, there are two reasons why the benefits of social media
outweigh the drawbacks. First of all, instead
of spend
numerous time Change the verb form
spending
to meet
friends face to face, Change the verb form
meeting
people
can contact with
their partner more Change preposition
apply
convinient
and quickly. Correct your spelling
conveniently
For example
, in covid-19 panamic
, everyone cannot go out, Correct your spelling
panoramic
pandemic
therefore
, using social media
is the only way to contact with
each Change preposition
apply
others
. Change to a singular noun
other
Moreover
, in the past, meeting people
in different nations is
very hard, Wrong verb form
was
nevertheless
, these days, it become easier. Secondly
, social media
also
help
someone in Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
emergecy
cases. Because it always Correct your spelling
emergency
update
tops of news, some Change the verb form
updates
indiviuals
who stay in Correct your spelling
individuals
emergey
cases may have Correct your spelling
emergency
chance
to help.
Correct article usage
a chance
On the other hand
, social media
have some drawbacks according to
some people
. Firstly
, the relationship between two person
may break up. Change to a plural noun
people
Due to
lack
of Correct article usage
a lack
communicate
offline, it is so difficult to get close relationships or Replace the word
communication
breaking
up. Wrong verb form
break
In addition
, social media
also
bring
some negative problems about identity theft. Correct subject-verb agreement
brings
People
when
use social Correct word choice
who
media
will provide their personal information. If they do not check and secure, someone could have stolen your personal information and racked up debts or committed fraud- all with your name on it.
In conclusion, I think that the advantages of social media
outweigh the disadvantages according
the Add the preposition
according to
convinent
and quickly of social Correct your spelling
convenient
continent
media
. However
, customer need to use it carefully, unless their information will be steal
.Change the verb form
be stolen
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grammar
Improve grammatical accuracy, such as subject-verb agreement and correct usage of prepositions. Pay attention to articles ('a', 'an', 'the').
vocabulary
Enhance vocabulary to include more complex and varied word choices that precisely convey your ideas.
task response
Develop ideas more fully with relevant, specific examples and detailed explanations.
coherence and cohesion
Work on logical progression of ideas to ensure each paragraph flows smoothly and stays focused on a single main idea.
task response
The essay provides clear points supporting both the advantages and disadvantages of social media.
structure
The writer makes a good effort to include an introduction and conclusion.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example