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Band 2.5

Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organization. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self- employed?

#people #work #company #organization #be #case #self-
In
Change preposition
At
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 present time a large segment of
people
 pick to
be working
Wrong verb form
work
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 for themselves,
instead
 of working for others.
This
 essay is going to focus on cases of
this
 phenomenon and
the
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its
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 drawbacks. The main
reasons
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reason
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of
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apply
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people
 prefer to be
self employed
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self-employed
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 is can have the ability to choose whoever
you
Correct pronoun usage
they
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 want to work with
also
Correct word choice
and also
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choosing
Wrong verb form
choose
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 the right time to work . Apart from that, citizens can spend most of their time with their
beloved
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loved
show examples
and
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ones and
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 family.
For instance
 , increasing numbers of
instagram
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Instagram
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influencer
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influencers
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 and
youtubers
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YouTubers
 nowadays because of the high income and the freedom they
to
Add a missing verb
have to
show examples
 do what they want most. The only drawback of being
self employed
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self-employed
show examples
it is hard to
startup
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start
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 and
keeping
Wrong verb form
keep
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 up with
low paying
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low-paying
show examples
people
 should be
patience
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patient
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 and work hard for very long periods to be very successful .
For example
, owning
company
Correct article usage
a company
show examples
 is very difficult to manage at the beginning it
need
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needs
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 so many sacrifices to get the benefits of it .
To sum up
,
people
 nowadays are more interested
to be
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in being
show examples
self employed
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self-employed
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 rather than working in companies for many
resable
Correct your spelling
reasonable
 reasons
nevertheless
 there
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 so
many
Correct quantifier usage
much
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hard working
Add a hyphen
hard-working
show examples
 should be done to achieve it.
Submitted by may.al.zemami on

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sentence structure
Work on sentence structure and grammar to make the essay more fluid and easier to read.
examples
Provide more detailed and specific examples to support your points. This could strengthen the arguments and make them more relatable.
content
Clarify and expand on the drawbacks of being self-employed for a more balanced discussion.
structure
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps in understanding the overall structure.
content
The main reasons for choosing self-employment are stated clearly.
focus
The essay is focused on the topic throughout and does not deviate from the main subject.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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