IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Task 1. The plans below show a harbour in 2000 and how it looks today. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Your report should comprise a minimum of 150 words.

#plans #show #harbour #summarise #information #features #comparisons #report
The
two
 maps illustrate the development of Porth Harbour between 2000 and the present.
Overall
, the area has
been
Correct your spelling
seen
show examples
 significant changes in infrastructure, stores, and facilities over the period. In 2000, the harbour was a basic facility with
two
 narrow roads, one was connected directly and the other was connected indirectly to the main road, both roads led to
two
 different parking lots. As can be seen, showers & toilets lay north of the first
car
park
, next to it was the place that had private yachts for the visitors. In the northwest, the dock was built for
two
 passenger femes to
park
.
In addition
, the road which lies in the south, connects to the other
car
park
 and lifeboat. A huge
castle
 was located in the southeast, but it is no longer being used. On the left side of the
castle
has
Verb problem
is
show examples
 a public beach for everyone came here on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
vacation. Following the development, the Porth Harbour has had remarkable additions in its construction. The road has a noticeable innovation. To become more convenient for visitors,
two
 paths are built and connected directly to each
car
park
. In modernization, the ancient
castle
 is repaired into a hotel, which
also
 connects with the
last
 path. In the present, showers & toilets are built on the north side of the second
car
park
.
Moreover
, fishing boats and private yachts are transposed together. Another significant change is that the area in the north is expanded into 3 docks for more ships to come in. On the left side of the lifeboat, stores are built
such
 as cafes and shops to serve customers.
However
, the public beach lay next to the
castle
 in the past, which has been changed to a private beach for the hotel at the moment.
Submitted by dohuyhoang on

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task response
Try to avoid minor inaccuracies or awkward phrasing, such as 'public beach for everyone came here on the vacation.' Consider: 'public beach for visitors on vacation.'
coherence cohesion
Work on improving the fluidity and clarity of transitions between points to enhance coherence.
task response
The essay includes a detailed comparison of the harbour in 2000 and today, showing significant changes clearly.
coherence cohesion
The structure of the essay is logical, with a clear introduction and detailed descriptions following.
task response
Main points are supported with relevant specific examples from the map.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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